Join the club of all of those who have dealt with alcoholic relatives, especially those in the immediate family. Your core problem is not your parents, Mrhunt, but the hold the disease has on you. There is no truer statement ever made that alcoholism is a family disease and it is a rare person who does not become infected whether or not they ever take a drink themselves and/or whether the family members are still drinking. It is pervasive, persistent, and can rob you much of the joy, peace of mind, and sanity that you otherwise can have.
You are wise and correct to intellectually understand that it is not your fault that your parents screwed up their lives however they might have done that. It is a far different thing, however, to be able to intellectually and emotionally detach and to learn how to focus how all this has screwed up your life and learn how to deal with that. Once you do, you will no longer need to be driven by or prisoner of guilt, misplaced sense of responsibility, and other poorly understood dynamics that get boiled into the mix.
And you will then make much better decisions regarding your parents and how to deal with whatever you feel obligated to do there.
What you should do is type ACOA into your browser and read up on "Adult Children of Alcoholics", then call your local AA or otherwise find a group near you. Commit to attend weekly (or more frequent) meetings for at least six months. Initially you are likely to feel frustrated and impatient and think it isn't helping. You must give it time to sink in though. Give it at least six months.
If you have the time and are especially motivated to get a handle on this, you would also benefit from some months (or more) in Al-Anon. Use the same method to find a group near you. Stick it out for at least six months even if you think it isn't helping.
Both groups will direct you to some good reading material and read it all.
Don't expect a miracle cure overnight. It has taken years for this strange malady to infiltrate your psyche and expect that it will take some time to notice significant recovery.
But it can change your life for the positive in amazing ways. Don't delay.