Today’'s breaking news stories…

Really seems like the female breaking news staff is trying to make the males regret making off-color jokes.

Same old, same old jokes - nothing new under the sun. Come up with more
ingenuity, breaking news male staff members!

To Infinity & Beyond! Terrestrial-mass Exoplanet

Planet with British weather found 20 light years away


Cold, rainy, inhabitants likely to be hostile

Posted in Space, 17th May 2011 15:11 GMT

A group of boffins claims to have spied the "first discovered terrestrial-mass exoplanet in the habitable zone", the BBC reports.

The planet in question is orbiting the much-studied star Gliese 581, some 20 light-years away in the constellation Libra. Of the possible worlds orbiting the red M-class sun, Gliese 581d had already been proposed as a repository of water, although previous studies suggested its distance from the solar system's centre means it would be too cold for liquid H2O.
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Gliese 581d then took centre stage as perhaps the first known habitable alien world, but the very existence of that planet has been called into serious doubt.

The astronomers from the Institut Pierre Simon Laplace in Paris have now re-evaluated Gliese 581d, declaring it first Blighty-like exoplanet – cold, rainy and just about capable of supporting life. Their simulations point to a dense, CO2 atmosphere which would provide "a signicant greenhouse effect" to raise the mean global temperature above 0°C.

There are a couple of minor impediments to human colonisation of Gliese 581d, however. The atmosphere is, in common with our own Middlesbrough, toxic. The planet is also probably tidally locked to its sun, meaning one side in permanent darkness, and the other with light perpetually struggling to penetrate the fug.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/05/17/blighty_exoplanet/

Life is most likely to form within the circumstellar habitable zone (CHZ) within a solar system, and the galactic habitable zone (GHZ) of the larger galaxy (though research on the latter point remains in its infancy). The HZ may also be referred to as the "life zone", "Comfort Zone", "Green Belt" or "Goldilocks Zone".

"This porridge is too hot," Goldilocks exclaimed.
So she tasted the porridge from the second bowl.
"This porridge is too cold."
So she tasted the last bowl of porridge.
"Ahhh, this porridge is just right!" she said happily.
And she ate it all up.


A "Goldilocks planet" is a planet that falls within a star's habitable zone, and the name is often specifically used for planets close to the size of Earth. The name comes from the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears, in which a little girl chooses from sets of three items, ignoring the ones that are too extreme (large or small, hot or cold, etc.), and settling on the one in the middle, which is "just right". Likewise, a planet following this Goldilocks Principle is one that is neither too close nor too far from a star to rule out liquid water on its surface and thus life (as humans understand it) on the planet. However, planets within a habitable zone that are unlikely to host life (e.g., gas giants) may also be called Goldilocks planets. The best example of a Goldilocks planet is the Earth itself.

Gliese 581d orbits on the outer fringes of the star's "Goldilocks zone", where it is not so hot that water boils away, nor so cold that water is perpetually frozen. Instead, the temperature is just right for water to exist in liquid form.



Libra (♎) is the seventh astrological sign in the Zodiac, originating from the constellation of Libra. In astrology, Libra is considered a "masculine", positive (extrovert) sign. It is also considered an air sign and is one of four cardinal sins errrrrrr signs. Libra is ruled by the planet Venus (which also rules Taurus).

Could be a load of bull... but who knows!

Onwards and upwards - we do endeavour!

I spy, with my little eye, Goodness Gracious, Great Balls of Fire !

Until the very last line, it seemed like the balls references had ended.

Vernacular Headlining

Aboard Atlantis was the first time in history that two butterflies survived the chrysalis stage of development and spread their wings as fully grown Painted Lady butterflies in microgravity. Although many species of insects have boldly gone where no insect has gone before, it was the first occasion that a butterfly survived the larvae phase, gone on to form a chrysalis and then emerge as a mature butterfly.

Endeavour will be carrying a peculiar live cargo on their voyage: an intrepid three-inch creature named Euprymna scolopes, a.k.a., the Hawaiian bobtail squid.

The squid are part of a microgravity experiment to determine the impact of space (if any) on beneficial bacteria, according to Jamie Foster of the University of Florida in Gainesville.

See, this species of squid has a built-in flashlight that uses bacteria as batteries to help navigate murky nighttime waters, hunt for prey, and hide from predators. There is a convenient little cavity on the squid's underside that serves as home to colonies of bacteria known as Vibrio fischeri.

The cavity organ is lined with threadlike cilia that sweep bacteria from the surrounding water into the cavity, and the bacteria set up a colony. Once that colony reaches "critical mass," they emit a telltale glow (bioluminescence). The glowing bacteria are surrounded by stacks of reflective plates to focus the light outward.

That light helps the squid hunt for prey in dark waters. It also provides camouflage from any organisms trying to eat him, because the squid doesn't cast a telltale shadow on the ocean floor as a result of the moon's rays shining down into the water. The squid can even control the "wattage" of this bio-flashlight, simply by limiting the amount of oxygen that reaches the cavity organ. (The bacteria need lots of oxygen for the chemical reaction that produces the light.)


So the squid get a handy flashlight, and the bacteria get a cozy home, and everyone wins. (everyone'squids in). It's a mutually beneficial relationship, similar to the manu microbes inhabiting human immune and digestive systems. But human beings "are way too complex" for this kind of experiment


http://news.discovery.com/space/bobtail-squid-hitches-a-ride-on-space-shuttle.html


not so for the hoi palloi - the rag, tag and bobtail crew whose vernacular is simple to understand

A bobtail was the tail a horse which was cut short. Shakespeare makes reference to the word in King Lear, 1605. Soon after that it was used by John Fletcher, in Monsieur Thomas, 1619, as slang for a cur or contemptible rascal. A tag was a piece of torn, hanging-down cloth. Those were combined with rag to form the earlier version of the phrase - tag, rag and bobtail. This was recorded by Samuel Pepys in his Diary for 6th March 1659:

"The dining-room... was full of tag, rag, and bobtail, dancing, singing, and drinking."

The later form 'raggle-taggle' is an extension of 'rag-tag'. This was in use from the end of the 19th century, for example, in the hagiographer, antiquarian, novelist and eclectic scholar Sabine Baring-Gould's novel, Urith: a tale of Dartmoor, 1891

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/rag-tag-and-bobtail.html

"A raggle-taggle, beggarly crew" - so sayeth the man from the Manor.

Onward...

Iza long gone peeps!

We'll miss you!

PS A bobtail nag is mentioned in the song, "Camptown Races".

YOU

UNDER

Magazine

OK, OK......no more funny stories about balls!

Zounds! Torquay Golf Club in Nun trouble!
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/863556-torquay-golf-course-rearranged-after-nuns-struck-by-rogue-balls

Another nun in trouble? Where's Diane? Does she have an alibi?

And what about the missing X? I am guessing it's unknown.

Bloody nuns shouldn't be in trouble at all. Isn't it "with God we go and in God we trust?" So that should be more than sufficient to bail them out for just about anything..... Now, if you ask DSK about it, that's another picture entirely.

(Old Goat: we enjoy every story you come up with)

CalamityJane, do the nuns stay out of trouble by bathing, or not bathing?

Declaring he will tell no more stories about balls and then immediately gives an account of balls hitting nuns!

Exceptional batting by nuns, but Sister Maria Gigante takes first as she is hit by a pitch - a base on balls.

Funny thing is, nuns have a lot of faith as this report will show:

A man and his wife were out for a relaxing Sunday drive in the countryside when they detectd that a group of nuns parked on the opposite side of the road were pouring something into their gas tank from a bedpan. The man shook his head and said “Those nuns sure have a lot of faith!”.

Granted, faith is difficult to understand. Yet, the photo of the nuns playing baseball turns me on for some strange reason.

Hah! Nuns are like the forbidden fruit - they become more enticing when one
cannot have them.

Daddy had a Harbour seal
She'd sunbathe in his punt

Hang on.....wrong thread....let's see....a non testicular related story beginning with i ......

OK......
In Kansas, an attempted kidnapping in Wichita ended abruptly recently, after a shooting accident.

According to the reports, one of three would be kidnappers pulled a gun, shot at a teenager, missed, put the gun back into his waistband and it went off, hitting him in the left testicle.

The same man then accidentally immediately shot himself in the calf, presumably because he was in pain, or perhaps he was surprised....

The 23 year old man was arrested when he sought medical attention at a medical center. His two companions, aged 18 and 20 were also arrested.

http://www.thevoiceofreason.com/RealFunnyNews/2006/51-KidnapperCalamity.htm

Just when you wonder about evolution, Darwin comes along and fires a gun at some burglar's balls.

Kansas is probably just a special place for Darwinians Well, as long as they don't make a mess and don't eat in supermarkets, I am all fine with it.

Love of free samples cause supermarket eating, usually.