I guess I should 'splain' here that I go home at least semi reeling from each and every one of our art openings. My business partner, who I should just start to call Sue on a2k instead of always writing out the words 'business partner', have gallery openings on the first sat. evening of each month.
We are tired when they start, as we have cleaned the whole place, taken down the last main show, reallocated remaining paintings, fixed the walls, sometimes including repainting, worked out lots of advertising and lists, set up the new show always dealing with the artist, gotten a batch of giant extravagant looking flowers for the front windows, cut the cheese, kept working at our other job which makes us a living (landscape architecture), and gone home and changed to become darling and charming just as we are winding down. Her husband, for example, has just had major surgery....and I need to be picked up, since I don't drive at night since I am nightblind.
And then the opening begins....
for the next three hours. We try to keep it happy, we pay attention to anyone who is paying attention to the art, we keep music going, and talk flowing among 200 - 400 people.
I am your usual quiet person, this is all a stretch for me.
I have spent some time watching swirling group behavior in the last few years.
I don't have any answers re party dynamics, but it might be a subject for somebody's book.
It sounds like Liberty's circle of friends is very close and comfortable with each other. When you have a group like that it's very easy to relax and let your hair down and not have to really "play hostess". So Miss X's (or whatever we've been calling her) behavior must have have really caught her off guard.
Something on that order happened to me once in my home and I (the hostess, who was supposed to do something) just froze. I'm not confrontational at all. People are supposed to be nice!
Osso, I've got to hand it to you and Sue. What you do is amazing and must be very stressful!
Listen Liberty, If you're gonna be pissed, great.
However,
If you are going to be pleasant, have other friends, develop this "What the hell" attitude, you're just going to have to start another thread. I can't deal with this changing emotions thing!
Osso -- I'm getting tired just thinking about going through all of that! It sounds very cool, though. Years ago, I helped an artist boyfriend of mine set up for a show once, and it was absolutely exhausting.
Fealola, I agree -- people ARE supposed to be nice!
Morganwood -- lol...changing emotions? I haven't been pissed in the last couple of days -- not raging pissed, anyway. In fact, I think the last truely pissy message I posted in this thread was way back on page 6! Okay, I got a little irritated earlier after talking to Ramona, but I think I nipped it in the bud.
It's not a "what the hell" attitude and I'm sorry it comes off that way, I must seem like ice-queen or something. I just know that being raging pissed about anything is counter-productive, physically exhausting, and usually only leads to evil words and evil deeds. And that's bad, right?
I'm sad, though, if that makes you feel any better. Honestly, it's been a rough week. I'm tired. I don't like losing friends.
LibertyD - have you decided that the friendship is over?
I went back and read your original post - where you describe your relationship - it will be sad if you have to give up such a long-standing friendship - with someone you say you've relied on in the past. I understand that these things happen - I've been on both sides of friendships ending - most often from fading away for one reason or another. It's sad when the ending is gentle. A bit more stressful when it's not so gentle.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
Understanding, support and respect to you, Liberty.
Thinking good thoughts for you and wishing for the best.
Beth, I hope not, but judging by the phone call (and an email later) she doesn't see my side of it and I don't see hers. So, we'll see what happens.
Thanks Sofia -- that means a lot.
My comment on our art openings is a tangent to what was going on here on this thread, a family party. Me making noise re my own concerns, relevant but not so very much.
What do I care about, re this situation? I care that Liberty believes in herself and acts kindly even when she knows where her lines set. And kindly when she doesn't. But always straightforwardly, as in not lying.
Oh, I reread my last post and see it sounds like I was suggesting Liberty was lying, eek, no, that isn't what I meant at all. Just that she should continue being her kindly(while straightforward) self.
Osso -- I knew what you meant!
And thank you.
I'm glad you shared your story about your gallery and the parties you throw there. Next time I think about doing more than usual at a gathering, I'll know who to get advice from, for sure!
Sounds like you've got a pretty great gang of people in your family/friend circle (with lots of clients mixed in there too?)
