Buggered english:

The sturgeon and the sandpiper
agreed upon a bet:
Who could journey faster
from sandy beach to islet.
The sturgeon being full of eggs
thought: "I'm too heavy, my!
Although I am a swimmer,
the sandpiper can fly."
The sandpiper thought deeply,
and decisions they were made:
"I shall not fly, let's simply make it
roe versus wade."

There is no way that I nor anyone can top that, Cav. Fantastic
(unless, of course, the topping is a tiny taste of pate.)

Hi Bo, I know I said that I would never floccinaucinihilipilificate your threads, but I have to say that I cringe when I see numbers used as words. Cringe. I'm not happy with other truncations, but they don't make me cringe.

To me truncated language smacks of laziness, ignorance, and the need for speed. None of these apply to the situation you describe, but it's what comes to mind when I see such writing. Sorry to be such a grouch, Grinch, old fart, whatever.

Please, Roberta. That should be farledoat.

Letty, Huh? Old fart is verboten?

Cav, Loved the poem.

thanks 4 the input:

vivian; "if you are going for phonetic shouldn't it be culler and senter?"

i should be more precise; i'm looking 4 simpler spelling, with less key strokes, but not changing letters 2b more accurate; if the pronunciation is accepted, then ?'standard' letters r fine but i wish 2 shrink any wasteful additions. (I'm going 2 redefine my requirements shortly 4 myself, and all)

vivian; "To me truncated language smacks of laziness, ignorance, and the need for speed."

exactly; my treatise is that over time laziness will win out, wherever possible without stifling meaning!

vivian; "Sorry to be such a grouch, Grinch, old fart, whatever."

never apologize 4 being right!

letty; "from the belly of a sturgeon............come(s) a stench of still born knowledge"

u're not off ?'topic'; it's the sturgeon that's ?'OFF'

cav; please, bring on ?'votre frere' mon ami!?'
And "?'roe' versus wade." how fitting!(but should have been vs!)

obs.../gustav..; "I have some visceral predisposition to hate, hate, hate, such truncation of words."

so do i, this is very uncomfortable 4 me!

1T'Z P41|\|FuLLY 0b\/105 y00L |\|3\/3r H4\/3 |\/|4|) H4x0r 5k1llZ, |\|ooB1E!!!!!!!!!!!

yeh, mong...; that's really 'readable' (whad'e say? )

another thing i have 2 deal with is whether to use the shotest common denominator word (scrapping meaning), e.g. nun 4 none, etc.

my prime aim is that the text must continue 2 flow, without bogging the reader down with the need 2 rethink the meaning of a sentence or phrase (my use of the term 'phonetic' was incorrect; the look should b visably different, but similar enough not 2 impede the reader!)

Bogo, check this out.. English to H4X0R Translator

well thanks a lot mong..; now i have another place 2 go 2 waste my time;
the 'random word' part of their dictionary rules!

I shall try to send him an e-mail with your original post. He is at the University of Pennsylvania now. Apparently they don't like being called UPenn, as it brings up issues regarding Penn State, not Ivy.

if they were 2 rename it 'Oracle of Pennsylvania'
then it would be 'OPenn' (or perhaps an irish touch O'Penn?).............or something...........geeze brains r messy things!

[r u sure you want u're brother talking 2 me?]

He's a Libra. Very accomodating.

Bo, All the nasty things you think vivien said were, in fact, said by me.

Monger, I understand almost every word. We've been corresponding a lot. Maybe some of your knowledge has rubbed off. Not such |\|ooB1E as we thought.

Truly sorry roberta/vivien;
if i could read i probably wouldn't b doing this!

Monger's sig confuses schizophrenia with MPD....or so I told myself

Oops, his sig changes with his avatar....clever bastards, you and Craven