@Finn dAbuzz,
Just addressing your highlighted points...
Does Obama have a grandiose sense of self-importance or do you ascribe that to him? Some one with no hope of winning the Presidency running might have a grandiose sense of self-importance; someone who can pull it off doesn't. You could probably say that every candidate for President except for Bob Dole suffered this same defect. I'll get to the Bob Dole example in a minute.
Obama doesn't live in a dream world of exceptional success, he lives in a real world of exceptional success. He's become President of the United States. In his 40's. You don't consider that successful? If his two books bombed, you might have a point, but they brought him millions.
I think the "special" comment would have applied really well to Bill Clinton, but I haven't seen any of that from Obama. If you have some concrete examples, I'd entertain them.
On the deference comment, could you provide some examples? I think Obama has expected that he will receive
no deference, especially from the opposition. Bush expected a honeymoon from Dems and he basically got one. Obama had some hope that Republicans would work with him and that hope was dashed pretty quickly.
I don't know where the attitude thing comes from. I think Bush was much more of the "my way or the highway" mentality. What attitude do you think the President of the United States should have? I hear lots of people say "how dare he bow to the Saudis" and then turn around and say he's an arrogant SOB.
Back to Dole: I read a very interesting article in Time during the Bush/Clinton race that has stuck in my mind. The writer suggested that there are basically three types of personalities that run for President.
The first is the personal achiever (what you might call the narcissist, the person who believes in himself.) Every person who runs has to have some of this. This person is where he is because of personal achievement and charisma. Strengths include intelligence, willingness to look at new solutions, high work ethic. Weaknesses include a "rules don't apply to me" attitude, and a tendency to surround himself with those of a similar mindset. Think Clinton, Obama, Guilliani, most Christian leaders, lots of sports figures, some CEO's.
The second is the Noble Family group (the article had a better name). These people come from families that were raised to power and consider public service as their family obligation and trade. Think Bush Sr., Gore, younger Kennedys. Maybe Bush Jr.
The third group consists of people who have risen to the top of large organizations. These people might end up as Prime Minister in a parlimentary system. Here is where Dole fits in. These people started at the bottom and worked their way up, rung by rung. Strengths include strong institutional support and great relationships with branches of government. Downside is a lack of originality. This group also include Colin Powel, military brass in general, business execs who rose up from the ranks. It seems to me this group is the one that considers the Presidency as just one more job higher in the chain of command.
So, I bring this all up because just about every President in our TV, press bite age is going to come from the first group. If this person is not to your liking, you could easily ascribe the traits of a narcissist to them. Of the recent candidates, I think Obama is one of the least narcissistic of the lot. If you don't like him, I doubt any one could convince you of that.