slight moral dilemma...

You should not go to bed with anyone you have not know for at least 10 minutes. If you do, you will be called a slut, because that is what you are if you do that.

If you wait at least 10 minutes -- all bets are off.

By the way -- any girl who does not have sex with a guy after the 10 minutes are up is probably a lesbian.

I hope that helps.

As odd as it sounds, when I've broken up a relationship, usually the last thing on my mind is how long I need to wait before sleeping with someone else in order to keep my reputation intact. I think I'd question the sincerity of the relationships (and probably wouldn't even call them "relationships"). I must have a slow-healing heart.

If your gut feelings tell you it's too soon, it's too soon. Don't ever confuse a reasoned decision with the messages being sent out by your hormones!

I don't think that sounds odd! Hey! Call me old fashioned.

i don't personally believe there is any reasoned explanation for any relationship

True, dys, but I can't see where you've explained anything here.

That's not a "delimma" by any sense of the word. You go for the gusto when both of you feel the magic no matter what the timing. c.i.

Re: slight moral dilemma...


How 'bout not telling your friends when you sleep with someone?

Or, stop sleeping with all of your friends.

The trick to avoid those labels is to simply restrict the number of people you sleep with in certain groups.

E.G. if you sleep with 10 people from work you might ahve problems. But if you sleep with 2 from work, two from a circle of friends, two from school.....


Ok, that was slightly tongue in cheek. It's only your decision who you sleep with and a number does not a "slut" make.

But if you are really worried about it, it's easier just to limit the numbers within each circle than anything else.

Where did you get that from? Nowhere is that stated and it's a harsh accusation.

Dude, I'm also speaking tongue in cheek. It was a joke, a play on words, to wit.

I thought it was sort of implied, cuz otherwise how would your friends know who you'd been sleeping with? Oh well, life's short. Enjoy.

I say invite all your friends over and just have a great big old fashioned orgy. That way they can't accuse you of doing anything they haven't been involved with themselves.

fishin gave the best answer. c.i.

I wish fishin' had been around 20 years ago to give me that advice. :wink:

It sounds to me like this-
if you tell all of your friends who and when you sleep with all the time to the extent that they actually comment on it....
they are now either being very harsh and unfriendly or very protective and upfront

the only other reason I could see for friends to say something like this well...
let just say itd be time to take fishins advice

Good Luck which ever way it goes for ya, and hope you figure out which type of friends they are, or stop telling all your firends all the details...Craven had good advice for that side of it

Honestly, the last three women whom I asked to sleep with me (eventually) did that, but it was a very trying time because they kept wanting to have sex instead of just snuggling all cozy and dozing. Now I ask for a nap instead and it saves everyone a lot of embarassment.

One way to avoid people giving you mean labels is to just not have people in your life. If they don't know you, and don't care to know you, then they won't be judging and assuming so many things about you. People who actually care about you won't give a damn about the label and instead will ask you how your relationship is going, and how do you feel about it! They will want to know you, your experiences, your feelings, your thoughts.

The only thing that matters is what *you* think of yourself. Do you have certain things you look for in friends, peers, and sleeping partners? Are you determined to behave according to your own standards? There you go.

If people want to think you're a slut or a whore, that's their shallow mind-game, and hurts only their own understanding. *They* remain uninformed and blind when they cling to such labels.

Personally, most whores I know are hard-working, honest, considerate, highly principled and kind. They have standards for how to do a good job, and help people throughout the community. They are the only people I know who are willing to really talk, be there, and just be nice to people -- when so much of our society is just plain hateful, abusive and impersonal. It's odd how the most caring and supportive human beings are often the ones most criticized and attacked. Whores deserve much more respect! But as I said, your opinion of that label is the only one that matters.

Choose your friends wisely, because the choice is yours.

Bingo !
If it's right, then it's right. The time doesn't matter.
Otherwise what are you going to do ? Start paying attention to people who don't live inside your head ?
Nah.
Just go with what you feel.