I'm having cat difficulties right now. Rufus is a former stray I adopted and I've had him for nearly three years, but he's still very skittish. He loves to be petted and have his tummy rubbed; he's about the most affectionate cat I've ever had. But at other times he's so nervous that any movement makes him run away and crouch in a corner, eyeing you with a look of utter distrust and fear, and he'll do this even in respose to gentle, calm movements-- you absolutely can't approach him, he has to decide to approach you.
Both of my cats are indoor cats-- Sticky goes outside if we're out there too, but she can't go out alone because we live in a neighborhood with lots of strays that are always fighting, and lots of speeding cars, and I just can't stand to have her wandering around. Rufus doesn't go out at all, because of his skittish nature I know he won't come back.
The problem is that Rufus slipped out a few weeks ago and hasn't come back. He's in the neighborhood, but he reverts to his stray cat behavior as soon as he gets outside, and won't come near us for anything.
I know some people say that if he won't come back it shows that he hates being an indoor cat and I should just leave him out. But he loves being a house cat as long as he's inside, he adores Sticky, and he loves to be cuddled. It's just that when he gets out, he's so nervous that he runs off and then it's like he forgets that he's ever known us. *Sigh*
I miss my big dopey kitty!