0
   

Perpetual Limerick (:3=

 
 
WhoodaThunk
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 02:51 am
The nun was a wordly-wise sister.
She said, "Listen up, Mister,
You can run but not hide
And the Lord's on my side."
"Twas in vain for a man to resist her.

++++++++++++++++++++++

She was known 'round the bingo hall
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 04:31 am
Merry Andrew wrote:
<You really are intent on hijacking this thread and diverting it from its stated purpose, aren't you, Mathos? Might I suggest that there's another thread for that purpose already in operation? It's called "dueling doggerel.">



Get a life Maid Andrew, life is too short for your type of complaining, what do you do for a living embalm bodies?
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 06:36 am
spendius wrote:
You have to make allowances Andy.

He's obviously pissed or stoned or a combination of the two.Or a member of the awkward squad who drops everybody in the **** with the Sergeant Major.

And he shot Dad dead with a gun. (Well "his" is a bit redundant and obviously only included to break the 8 syllable rule and he can't even rhyme his own Scarborough.

And he shot Dad dead with a gun.
And took to the hills with a nun
Who's wimple fell off
To please such a toff



What do we have here?

The posse comitatus?

Sherif Spendi with Deputy Maid Andrew, running around like a couple of wallies because Mathos won't play by their mediocre apathetic rules.

No doubt between you, you could muster up enough spunk to 'tell teacher'

These are prime examples of what neurotic underprivileged, underachieving, listless kids grow into.

You both need to become cosmopolite.

Don't rattle the tigers cage children, you have no idea how to handle him.
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 07:12 am
Mathos dear-

On a scale of 0-10 at the breaking rules game your stuff is about 0.001 which is on a par with the baby throwing its rattle out of the pram. You could improve a little on that,say to 0.0015, by submitting your efforts in dythrambic mock-epic form and in Urdu. That will enable you to break the rules on a more heroic level but it is probably best before you contemplate such drastic action that you get permission from your wife or your boss or whoever it is who is causing you to hit back at the world in the dramatic fashion you have chosen.

She was known 'round the bingo hall
As one it was easy to ball
A nod and a wink
And never a blink
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 07:23 am
You have obviously been out for a lunchtime pint or two Spendius.

I have visions of you sat on your throne!

A great white one, no doubt Maid Andrew is at your feet, both of you paying homage to the Maharajah of A2K.com

Who records the minutes of your meetings though?

We know were you obtain the paper, all words being duly recorded in chronological order and the applicable records being duly stuffed into the cracks in the brickwork for future descendants of the college protagonists to suffer education accordingly to the gists of the 'wally club'

Obscure in expression cryptic in thought, undistinguished in presentation the students will be obligated as parasites seeking upmanship in the drivel of the ancients.

It reminds me of Freud.

The pair of you no doubt have a notice of distinction over the closet door.

'Ad majora natus sum'
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 10:07 am
She was known 'round the bingo hall
As one it was easy to ball
A nod and a wink
And never a blink
And preferred the ones that were tall.

The was an old lady named Maude
Who everyone thought was quite odd
0 Replies
 
WhoodaThunk
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 11:06 am
The was an old lady named Maude
Who everyone thought was quite odd.
She had a slight limp
And traveled by blimp
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 12:23 pm
The was an old lady named Maude
Who everyone thought was quite odd.
She had a slight limp
And traveled by blimp
And stunk like a very old cod.


A farmer with no sense of smell
0 Replies
 
WhoodaThunk
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 01:03 pm
A farmer with no sense of smell
Planted garlic from here to hell
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 01:43 pm
A farmer with no sense of smell
Planted garlic from here to hell
Twas really too bad
That was all he had
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 02:00 pm
A farmer with no sense of smell
Planted garlic from here to hell
Twas really too bad
That was all he had
Apart from his cap and his bell.


When the boys came home from the front
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 02:05 pm
When the boys came home from the front
They didn't have very much blunt
They both got a job
Which Made mama sob
But Papa proceeded to grunt.

There once was a lad from Beroo
Who couldn't tie his right shoe
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 02:28 pm
There once was a lad from Beroo
Who couldn't tie his right shoe
He skenned to the left
Which warped all his weft
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 03:43 pm
There once was a lad from Beroo
Who couldn't tie his right shoe
He skenned to the left
Which warped all his weft
And caused a great hullaballoo.

A lad who can't tie shoelaces
A terrible danger faces
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 05:40 pm
A lad who can't tie shoelaces
A terrible danger faces
His shoes could fall off
During a quick boff
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 May, 2006 08:45 pm
A lad who can't tie shoelaces
A terrible danger faces
His shoes could fall off
During a quick boff
When his lady love he embraces.

I always wear boots or loafers
0 Replies
 
WhoodaThunk
 
  1  
Reply Tue 9 May, 2006 03:01 am
I always wear boots or loafers,
Sometimes mine and sometimes my chaffeur's.
I like the steel toe
Cuz once long ago
I stepped on two rabid gophers.

++++++++++++++++++++++

An old pair of sneakers will do
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Tue 9 May, 2006 12:15 pm
An old pair of sneakers will do
If you intend to be stepping in pooh
Stay away from cow pies
There are too many flies
Instead you should just use a loo.

Why haven't I met you before?
You're someone I would have adored
Your lips are so red
Bet you're good in bed...
0 Replies
 
Zedd
 
  1  
Reply Tue 9 May, 2006 09:05 pm
Why haven't I met you before?
You're someone I would have adored
Your lips are so red
Bet you're good in bed
I can't wait till I suck you dry
and under I, you will lie.

Whatever you do, just make sure to behave,
or daddy here will take out my stave
and whip you hard, on that bareass you have
and transform you to an obedient slave.

You looked up into my eyes and cried...
0 Replies
 
WhoodaThunk
 
  1  
Reply Wed 10 May, 2006 03:29 am
Zedd wrote:
Why haven't I met you before?
You're someone I would have adored
Your lips are so red
Bet you're good in bed
I can't wait till I suck you dry
and under I, you will lie.

Whatever you do, just make sure to behave,
or daddy here will take out my stave
and whip you hard, on that bareass you have
and transform you to an obedient slave.


It has a nice beat, is easy to dance to ... I'll give it a 5.
0 Replies
 
 

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