I've a terrible itch in my ear
that means its time for a beer
I'll twist the top
I've a terrible itch in my ear
that means its time for a beer
I'll twist the top
The itch may not stop,
But it will help you to persevere.
For your itch, I prescribe a car key
Sanitized to make it germ-free.
If that doesn't work
You may have a quirk
That requires spraying DDT.
++++++++++++++++++
Take two aspirin and give me a call
Take two aspirin and give me a call
Or, instead, go to bed with that gal
Take two aspirin and give me a call
Or, instead, go to bed with that gal.
After that, you see,
You'll have her V.D.
And your ear will not matter at all.
++++++++++++++++++++
Francis & I now wish you Godspeed.
We've healed you and you did not bleed.
Francis & I now wish you Godspeed.
We've healed you and you did not bleed
Gee, thanks a lot, guys
You are kind, brisk, and wise
Francis & I now wish you Godspeed.
We've healed you and you did not bleed.
Gee, thanks a lot, guys
You are kind, brisk, and wise.
Let us know if there's more that you need.
+++++++++++++++++++++++
On a mid-winter trip to Cancun
On a mid-winter trip to Cancun
The weather was like a monsoon
On a mid-winter trip to Cancun
Is that -cun with a sun, thun or kun?
<<cun = kun = monsoon>>
On a mid-winter trip to Cancun
The weather was like a monsoon.
The groom and the bride
Had to stay inside
On a mid-winter trip to Cancun
The weather was like a monsoon.
The groom and the bride
Had to stay inside
So they could sleep until noon
He tried to throw her to the moon
McTag wrote:On a mid-winter trip to Cancun
Is that -cun with a sun, thun or kun?
Well whoodathunk that one, I sigh
Please give me a plus for a try
I feel like a loon
I'd overlooked -kuhn
And O what a bad boy am I
He tried to throw her to the moon
But sprained his poor back, the buffoon
He tried to throw her to the moon
But sprained his poor back, the buffoon
His sexual technique
Turned out to be weak
He tried to throw her to the moon
But sprained his poor back, the buffoon
His sexual technique
Turned out to be weak
And the bride gave up soon
She met a strong sailor on a tall ship
Who was gorgeous but had a lisp
She met a strong sailor on a tall ship
Who was gorgeous but had a lisp
He thprayed when he thaid
Let'th thpeed to my bed
And I'll thleep with you clothe by my thide.
In the morning they woke with a jolt
In the morning they woke with a jolt
And out of that cot they did bolt
In the morning they woke with a jolt
And out of that cot they did bolt.
The girl with her thailor
And the crew of the whaler
Fomented a raucous revolt.
+++++++++++++++++
Her groom with the member that shrank
Found himself at the end of the plank
Her groom with the member that shrank
Found himself at the end of the plank
"Where's my Yacht when I need it
In my room you can eat it
And when resurrected, give it a yank"
She cast her blue orbs down his spine
And with his fingers did hers entwine
She cast her blue orbs down his spine
And with his fingers did hers entwine,
But then with a wink
He jumped in the drink
Thus ending his sorry bloodline.
++++++++++++++++++++
The widow was filled with despair
