The unseen accomplice of Merlin
Was paid every week in pounds sterlin'
He hoarded his cash
Unseen, made a dash
Ending up in a brothel in Berlin
The teacher set the class an exam
Concerning the subject of spam...
The teacher set the class an exam
Concerning the subject of spam,
Bu the 'puter she used
Had been thusly abused...
The teacher set the class an exam
Concerning the subject of spam,
But the 'puter she used
Had been thusly abused
And all that came out was plum jam
Ten tailors went to the seaside one day...
Ten tailors went to the seaside one day,
One was straight, the rest were gay,
<evil grin>
Ten tailors went to the seaside one day,
One was straight, the rest were gay
They played nine mens morris
While the one they called Doris
Played hoopla by herself in the hay
next please....
Silly me - for some reason, I read tailors as sailors
The banker went for an eye test
The banker went for an eye test
The doctor said your eyes you must rest
The banker went for an eye test
The doctor said your eyes you must rest
You have been leching too much,
without getting anything as such
The banker went for an eye test
The doctor said your eyes you must rest
You have been leching too much,
without getting anything as such
Now get your hand off my left breast !
A prognosticator who came from Saskatchewan...
A prognosticator who came from Saskatchewan
Owned a nag who was always an also-ran,
Which spoke ill for his skill...
A prognosticator who came from Saskatchewan
Owned a nag who was always an also-ran,
Which spoke ill for his skill
And though all seemed downhill
At least long odds could be counted upon
Disraeli and Gladstone were both arguing
Over who Queen Victora was favouring...
Disraeli and Gladstone were both arguing
Over who Queen Victora was favouring...
Her Majesty's ministers
Could see nothing sinister
Disraeli and Gladstone were both arguin'
Over who Queen Victoria was favourin'..
Her Majesty's ministers
Could see nothing sinister
In biting, punchin' and kickin'
Its time for the Oscars again..
It's time for the Oscars again
Least they don't have to stand in the rain
It's time for the Oscars again
Least they don't have to stand in the rain
In comfort they'll sit
As they wait for the bit
When they find out if its pain or gain
Twelve monkees went shopping one day....
Twelve monkees went shopping one day,
(They had thought to make hay on the way)...
Twelve monkees went shopping one day,
(They had thought to make hay on the way)
The farm it was closed
And they felt so exposed
...........................
Twelve monkees went shopping one day,
(They had thought to make hay on the way)
The farm it was closed
And they felt so exposed
That they stopped, and went sobbing away...
.................................................................................
It is Monday already in Oz,
And I'm feeling quite sniffy because..
(No, is it really-we forget about this spinning globe in a voic thing !)
It is Monday already in Oz,
And I'm feeling quite sniffy because
Pretty soon you see
You'll be having your tea..
It is Monday already in Oz,
And I'm feeling quite sniffy because
Pretty soon you see
You'll be having your tea,
And I will be working in Oz!
...............................................................
A tiger, a leopard, and me...
