Some parties are only for two,
They did not invite me and you.
I felt so left out
I wanted to shout
From the back of my tiny queue.
+++++++++++++++++++++
Was my invite lost in the mail
Along with my money for bail?
Was my invite lost in the mail
Along with my money for bail?
The mailman's a nut
He should be fired, but
Was my invite lost in the mail
Along with my money for bail?
The mailman's a nut
He should be fired, but
He's rich now and has set sail.
Which way is the party, my friend?
Which way is the party, my friend?
Go ahead, then take the right bend
Which way is the party, my friend?
Go ahead, then take the right bend
The next house is Brenda's
- She's famed for her benders -
Which way is the party, my friend?
Go ahead, then take the right bend
The next house is Brenda's
- She's famed for her benders -
Bawdy Brenda's benders never end.
Bawdy Brenda and Boisterous Bob
you know him, the hideous gob
Bawdy Brenda and Boisterous Bob
you know him, the hideous gob
That stays up late
and tempts his fate
Bawdy Brenda and Boisterous Bob
you know him, the hideous gob
That stays up late
and tempts his fate
Him coming, is like having a 'mob'.
And what will we have for a 'feed'?
Some tasty sustenance I (yum) need-
And what will we have for a 'feed'?
Some tasty sustenance I (yum) need-
Candy or liquor?
Well, liquor is quicker,
And what will we have for a 'feed'?
Some tasty sustenance I (yum) need-
Candy or liquor?
Well, liquor is quicker,
But candy is dandy, and so, I hear, is "weed."
There once was an avid dope fiend
There once was an avid dope fiend
From his habit never was weaned
He woozed and he oozed
'til he literally froozed
On the floor where the ice water gleamed.
If you were Neanderthal man...
If you were Neanderthal man
And I was your number one fan
If you were Neanderthal man
And I was your number one fan
When your eye would blink
I would think it's a wink
If you were Neanderthal man
And I was your number one fan,
When your eye would blink
I would think it's a wink ...
Vine-pool my new swinging Tarzan?
++++++++++++++++++++
A Cro-Magnon who called himself Bruce
A Cro-Magnon who called himself Bruce
had a social philosophy simply obstuse
A Cro-Magnon who called himself Bruce
had a social philosophy simply obstuse
He'd smile very broad
At his woman called Maude
A Cro-Magnon who called himself Bruce
had a social philosophy simply obtuse
He'd smile very broad
At his woman called Maude
And pretend he was shagging a goose.
Homo sapiens has to be better
Homo sapiens has to be better
Behind the ears, they seem to be wetter.
Homo sapiens has to be better
Behind the ears, they seem to be wetter
You are joking, I bet
Why does good equal wet?
Homo sapiens has to be better
Behind the ears, they seem to be wetter
You are joking, I bet
Why does good equal wet?
It's better than a wet Irish setter.
(OK, OK don't push imgoing imgoing. What the hell else rhymes with wetter and better?)
Anyhow --
There once was a weird homo sapien
