A hearty young lass from Ukraine
Searched for a man -- all in vain.
It has to be stated
She felt most frustrated
God knows what the neighbours were saying.
In the Ukraine, e-dating is new
In the Ukraine, e-dating is new
And they're having to learn what to do
They're getting quite flirty
In fact downright dirty
In the Ukraine, e-dating is new
And they're having to learn what to do
They're getting quite flirty
In fact downright dirty
And the webcam is the new beau !
The prince is going to Vancouver
The prince is going to Vancouver
The place for a shaker and mover
He'll cast his dark eyes
Over lots of the guys
The prince is going to Vancouver
The place for a shaker and mover
He'll cast his dark eyes
Over lots of the guys
Driving his Range Rover!
Heading to Scotland
Heading to Scotland by car
And I hope that it isn't too far
To see sporrans and kilts
Heading to Scotland by car
And I hope that it isn't too far
To see sporrans and kilts
And wild men on stilts
Maybe meeting the Young Lochinvar
Oh, young Lochinvar is come out of the west
Through all the wide borders his steed was the best
Di blah di di blah di di blah di old rope
That's all that I know of that poem, I hope
What the hell was all that for? Search me
What the hell was all that for? Search me,
And extract from my bonnet the bee.
What the hell was all that for? Search me,
And extract from my bonnet the bee
That's busy and buzzing
My brain's all a'muzzing
So let us all stop and have tea
The scones and the strawberry jam
The scones and the strawberry jam
And the cream tell me that I am
In glorious Devon
(Rains six days in seven)
The scones and the strawberry jam
And the cream tell me that I am
In glorious Devon
(Rains six days in seven)
And we have delicious ham
Once in a temperance hotel
One time in a temperance hotel,
patients played a game of a show-tell,
One time in a temperance hotel,
patients played a game of a show-tell.
The primary task
Involved a small flask
One time in a temperance hotel,
patients played a game of a show-tell.
The primary task
Involved a small flask
Which they shared behind the stairwell.
A flask of 80-proof whisky
Made Whooda feel really frisky
A flask of 80-proof whisky
Made Whooda feel really frisky.
But that freewheel-a
Preferred tequila ...
Drank both & performed acts most risky.
+++++++++++++++++++++
Gin & tonics are not without charm
Gin & tonics are not without charm
Once I shared a few with a gendarme
Gin & tonics are not without charm
Once I shared a few with a gendarme
Both sitting under a oak
Gin & tonics are not without charm.
Once I shared a few with a gendarme,
Both sitting under an oak,
Me and that old soak.
Well, we did no one any harm.
How'd this thread turn to drink?
How'd this thread turn to drink?
is this how how our inner minds think?
Because yearning for liquor
How'd this thread turn to drink?
is this how how our inner minds think?
Because yearning for liquor
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker
Might land us all in the drink.
Ogden Nash was a clever poet
