Sheep - a poem in one sentence

aidan-

I'm glad you liked Veblen. The thing I like most about him is his very refined irony. Maybe you ought also to read C Wright Mills on him who does point to difficulties with his ideas but never ceases to admire him.

On your other request I think you might find Fernand Braudel's The Structures of Everyday Life useful but it is a bit massive. (3 vols).

How would you react if your son fancied being a beach bum in Cannes or joining the Foreign Legion. He's hardly testing you by choosing economics over medicine.How old is he? Has he tried Rider Haggard? Veblen is a bit of an acquired taste.

Thanks for the Google tip. You can read Salammbo on Google. Dear Lola clued me into that. She seems to have deserted us now.

I didn't say I liked him. I said I found him interesting. (Just pulling one of your little tricks there Spendius). For real though, I have to read more of him to get an idea of whether or not he's endorsing ideas or just reporting facts as they existed. For instance, one chapter I read was on the role of women in a household and how any bit of consumption by them that did not directly benefit the running of the household was considered to be waste. He described women as chattel. I need to read further and more carefully to see what his actual stance was, or if he even had one. Maybe he was just reporting the way it was - because in truth - that was the way it was.

If my son wanted to be a beach bum and found a way to support himself doing that - I'd be envious. He actually is a certified life-guard so it's not too far of a stretch to imagine that happening. I feel that I started my "real" life -working to support a lifestyle and jumping into the responsibilities of a family too early- so I'd feel happy for him if he enjoyed himself while he was still young. This move has helped him to realize that there's a whole world out there to experience and see. I support that whole-heartedly. That of course does not extend to his father or I supporting him financially while he whiles away his twenties. And he knows this. He's worked for his own spending money since he was fifteen years old. He's seventeen now.

The foreign legion might be another story. I'd actually hate for him to join the military or the police or any other career in which he faced daily danger. But on the other hand I'd be proud of the courage he was displaying if he decided to do so. But like I said, people (which is what kids are) need to feel free to do what they feel led to do, and as long as it's not illegal - there's not much a parent can complain about if they have children who are expressing who they are and the courage of their convictions.

I'll check those other two out.

I shower regular Spendius, morning, afternoon or evening when I finish work and again prior to retiring. I also take regular baths, saunas and steams, showering after all three.


If you wish to bathe and think whilst sat in your own dirty water, I am not surprised.

I've just been accused of being the only attention seeker on one thread so I suppose I'll have to live with the fact that only my bathwater is dirty.

I never use soap either.

You confirm a rumour that people from Yorkshire hide their money under the soap.

Do you come from Tierra-del-Fuego old chap?

You certainly provide plenty of evidence of the intellectual standards endemic in those regions.

You know this little exchange between you guys (including Spendius' reference to attention seeking) gave me a great idea. It's such a shame that all this biting wit and superior intellect is hidden in this obscure little thread- although I notice it does seem to have a pretty loyal readership everyday. It gives credence to the notion I've heard that most people are voyeurs at heart, doesn't it?

You guys should collect the best bits and maybe even write a script for a movie or play- you know kind of a comedy of manners.

Spendius could be the very intelligent, but slightly bumbling nutty professor-cum-puppet master observing all of the lesser mortals around him, Mathos could be the older and wiser, more savvy, but less intellectually obsessed counterpart. He could also throw in some of his naughty old playboy schtick (needed to add a bit of sexual interest). His character also acts as a wonderful method of bringing in this whole House of York/ House of Lancaster cultural and/or regional tension that adds so much delightful humor to the whole project.

And I could play the not very bright, naive and oblivious sap. I've pretty much perfected the part. Also, my American-ness would serve as a pretty good comic foil for you sophisticated and much more knowing Brits. The only caveat I would have is that as the only woman, I'd reserve the right to give a knowing wink to the audience now and then, so they'd know that in reality, I was the one who was running the whole show. You know like all those moms in the sitcoms who are married to the bumbling idiots - who always end up having to come in near the end, imparting wisdom and saving the day.

What do you think? And don't forget- as the idea person and the one who feeds you all these wonderful lines and plot twists (moving house, flower shows, baths, raising children)- I will be demanding royalties. We could even call it "Sheep- a play in (however many) acts. I mean it fits the whole theme of this whole thing. We could put my poem to music for the opening theme song. I'm sure there's someone on this forum who writes music.

Mathos - I'm surprised you still have skin. With all those baths, showers and saunas, I'm surprised you're not a prune. You must go through a lot of moisturizer.

Spendius - not to be your mother or anything - but geez - use soap once in a while. (And don't forget to wash behind your ears and between your toes).

Let me know what you think of my idea.

aidan-

You mean like Tom Jones?

You as Sophie, Mathos as Squire Western and my goodself as sweet Tom.

More like Alphaville to my mind. Me as Lemmy, Mathos as The Voice and you as--well catch it sometime.

Sit com Mums are designed to wheel ladies in front of adverts for- well look around you--you'll see what for.

It might be better as it is. I hate cliche.

Come on Spendius. Use a little imagination.

Look at the success of the Da Vinci Code. It's pure ****. But Dan Brown took a formula. A proven formula. And then he added his own little bit of creativity and spice to it. He gave pretty stock characters just the right plot with enough twists to achieve at least sales, if not literary, success.

It might not meet your high artistic and intellectual standards, but it's pleasing to the masses. A cliche is a cliche for a reason. It is easily understood by the majority of people. Many times cliche is recipe for success. (Jesus - I"m starting to remind myself of you - now that's scary).

I was just getting a little bored. Trying to spice things up a little. Glad you took it so well. Except you obviously didn't get it. (No - you would not have been sweet Tom- you don't present yourself as the leading man type- unless it was a character like Dr. Who or someone. Mathos, on the other hand - has the right flair to play Tom, although he might be too old if he's a grandfather...so no, it wouldn't work at all).
As you guessed, I have no idea what Alphaville is. So don't worry - I didn't get insulted- even though I know I was supposed to be... but that's okay... that's your schtick, right?
(Which reminds me of that Sonnet you mentioned. Funnily enough, that's one of my favorites, simply because Shakespeare is talking about "real" love. He's saying that his love, even with all her imperfections, is real to him and so more precious in the end than any of the idealized women other writers immortalize as perfect, and therefore mere creations of an over-active imagination).

I think we should scrap it too. Because, honestly, I think Mathos would have gotten the plum part, don't you? Your character would have come out of it looking kind of evil but stupid in the end, and my character would have looked stupid but evil in the end.

I don't know much about sitcom moms- especially in English tv. In American tv - I liked Olivia Walton. She was the best....

I could write a book that would blow Brown away but I can't be bothered. I really can't. This is what I like best. Free literature for anybody who wants it. I might not be any good but I am trying a bit. What do I want money for? It's the new Conservative Party's winning slogan. Haven't you heard. And as for fame-you can shove that up the central turd pipe in the Empire State Building with a possing machine. That's not a cliche is it?

My bath has been run-gotta go.

Aidan; If you think I would get involved with that idiot in any form of undertaking you really must visit your Doctor!

Everything he writes is total balderdash, the sot is a disgrace to humanity and mankind in general, if he had four legs and a tail he would have been put to sleep years ago.

You really should not encourage him to be more stupid than he already is either! Last but one post and he is already day dreaming the scenario of roles, how daft does one really get.

Have you thought of asking him to marry you? I think you would make a lovely couple! Now that would be a day out I would not want to miss, I would watch from a distance ( being too close would mean I would spoil your day by altering the way he looks) and take photographs of you both swirling down the country road to your horse drawn carriage.

Tell me, what would you wear for such a day and were exactly would you like to honeymoon? The Scilly Isles?

No, I'm not currently looking for a husband. And as for Spendius and I as a couple - OH MY G_D! That would be disaster. I can be overly emotional - he despises emotion. He'd want to spend our money at the pub - I'd want to spend our money on flowers. He'd lord it over me because he's so much smarter than I am, and then probably insist that I be the one to run his bath. We would argue about every single solitary thing because we're both as stubborn as mules. Never mind Tom Jones - it would be more like "The Taming of the Shrew" but without the happy, neat little ending. Hey - now there's a production we could do - I'd play Katherine, Spendius could be Pettruchio and you could play Baptista.

Except we'd have to modernize the setting and update the ending because I wouldn't be able to even pretend to submit.



Now, there's that laugh I've been waiting for. That was a good one Mathos - the Scilly Isles. I don't know what I'd wear. It'd depend on the time of year. What would you wear to such an event?


Spendius - I entirely believe you could outwrite Dan Brown, blindfolded and with one hand tied behind your back.
What's a possing machine by the way? Since you used an uncommon image and a word that is not readily known by the majority of people - no it doesn't work as a cliche.

Aidan; The post is directly above you, your playing at 'silly quotes ' again, why?

Why another scenario, its the real thing this, the first A2K wedding, think of the revenue it would produce, TV rights, Tattler, Hello Magazine.

You could have butterfly and firefly as your bridesmaids. The oink could have Setanta as his best man. Ben Gunn could be the preacher and Clary would be ideal on the organ.

Booze and flowers? This could be one wedding and a funeral even.


Possing machine by the way is derived from the old twirly whirly posser found in prehistoric washing machines, the clown probably has one.


An A2K wedding in Bradford! Brilliant.

I am still curious as to what attire you would both turn up in.

aiden wrote-in all innocence



Oh yeah. I've heard that before. It's a good job I'm not competitive.

Mathos wrote-



You reckon do you? It's a possibilty I suppose. She obviously searching for something with all this chasing about she says she does. A Bach fugue maybe. In Salisbury cathedral. I once heard one in there.

Do you like Bach?

Because since I don't like the way hurling veiled insults makes me feel about myself, this is my little way of being appropriately passive aggressive-you know-fitting in.



Did you not hear me say "NO"? And I thought of a couple more reasons. I think I remind Spendius of his mother (always a recipe for disaster) and he apparently doesn't use soap. I couldn't even go out to dinner with a man who doesn't use soap- much less marry him.
Anyway - I still don't know how old he is. (I saw a really sad little scenario yesterday waiting at a crosswalk. Young, handsome man with older, less attractive woman. He was walking ahead of her like she didn't exist or as if he was ashamed to be seen with her and she just looked miserable and beaten down. WHY WOULD A WOMAN PUT HERSELF IN THAT SITUATION?)




No offense to any of the kind souls you named here, but I prefer to have people I know at my wedding and attending me as bridesmaids, flower girls, etc.- you know, like my sisters perhaps, or my neices, or maybe even friends. And I prefer a string quartet to the organ, thank you very much. (Except for the wedding march- then I'd need a big, old organ. I always cry at that part in weddings. I don't know why - the pagentry of that part of it is pretty inspiring, I think).


Actually, no offense to Spendius - but that's probably how I'd feel, as if I'd be walking down the aisle to say goodbye to freedom. Marriage is a difficult concept for me to embrace fully.


Thanks for the info.




Ahem. In the US it's customary for the bride to be married in the church of her choosing. I don't even know where Bradford is.


Jesus, Mathos - a dress- I guess- for me anyway. You're more interested in it than I would be- (I was never one of those little girls who sat around dreaming about her big day).

Spendius - I do like Bach, although some of his compositions with their elaborate counter melodies and movements and the constant doubling back and returning to underlying themes can sound a little fussy to me sometimes. Not disparaging him at all - he was definitely a genius - but not my favorite composer. I generally like more straightforward and linearly crafted compositions.

Whenever I hear Bach's Prelude in C - I think of that old Saturday Night Live skit with Al Franken playing Stuart Smalley. Do you know it at all? He'd interview people like Paul McCartney and Michael Jordan in a very therapeutic, twelve-step like scenario- and they'd be totally confused. Check it out sometime, it's pretty funny.

aidan-

I don't know what to say about all that.

The Bach fugue was a joke.

Perhaps Mathos is more to your taste. Nonsense leaves me cold I'm afraid. Marriage has no meaning for me. It's an official category.

When Gauguin set up his tent in his island retreat a young native girl entered and announced--"I your's, me with you." He'd never seen her before.

I can only comment on the evidence as offered above by the future Bride and Groom;-

Spendius is already viewing Clary as a suitable organist, and even selecting the music. I am not able to decide exactly what he means by mentioning Salisbury Cathedral, obviously the rendezvous would be more convenient for Aidan, we will have to wait and see, time will tell.


Aidan being really in the mood despite her initial outburst of no thank you, to the dirty Yorkshire scruff, now wants her sisters, nieces and friends in attendance. Bridesmaids, flower girls, stringed quartet as opposed to Clary on the organ, except for the wedding march I note.

Mathos 'old son' you appear to be well suited as "A2K's Matchmaker."

I am feeling rather smug and pleased with myself here, what about a date though? We don't want to drag the engagement out too long, do we?


Must remember to order some boxes of Kleenex as well, Aidan likes to cry a lot. Some women do that though, I always thought weddings were joyous occasions, not morbid and tearful. Depends who one is marrying I suppose, yes with Spendius, I think any sane minded soul would be crying.

I couldn't help but wonder, would either of you lovebirds be requiring a prenuptial agreement, only I know an excellent solicitor who can muster up a first class document without going into heavy expense. This will only be possible after September though, he is presently serving a short term in The Scrubs for embezzlement.

Wow, a wedding. Are we all invited? What do you think they'd like as gifts, Mathos? I'm not too familiar with Aidan, but I know what Spendi would like - beer! And maybe some soap.

Despite your protestations to the contrary, I don't believe Aidan is going into this with a glad heart... in fact, I believe she has said NO on two separate occasions.... were you not listening, dear heart?

Mathos-

You have just been patted on the head by a concerned carer dear boy.

I think the shock and embarrassment of it all caused the initial outburst of 'No' Mame. However, she is really into the mood of things now, you can imagine her at home;

CD player going full blast, "I wanna be Spendis girl... " Checking all the fancy dresses on the web. Invitation lists.. Oh I rather think they will invite everybody, especially Spendius, he has loads of friends on A2K, the Chicago mob adore him.

I bet that Spendius comes out with a really expensive gift list, Royal Dalton China and the likes,, then "No don't open it Aidan, we can flog this lot tomorrow at the Leeds Military Hospital car boot sale." Never miss a trick those Tykes.

I won't be going myself though, I would probably end up really regretting going. I don't want to spoil Aidans big day for her either.

Will you be going Mame?

I suppose we will have to ask about, let people know what has happened, there could even be a bigger turnout than they had for the Chicago meeting.. Proper fish and chips this time though, eh Spends?