@Joeblow,
Nope. I think we're putting wedding on the back burner for now. We talked about pushing back til June...and then decided against that... I don't think March seems right, though. I'll report back when we feel solid about a date.
But, Rossi
is a miracle worker. I have no doubt she could knock off a truly lovely dress.
_________________________
I hope some people will give opinion about my latest debacle. I have an admittedly weird phobia. I hate having my picture taken. I mean, in some situations, I really vibe with the natives who feel like their soul is being wrenched from them. I feel physically ill about being in a picture; I have felt this way since I was in high school. Other times, when I don't feel quite so awful about it - I do a headjob on myself and power through it. I detest being a spectacle over it - but jesus christ - who is it hurting? Can't I make this decision? Isn't it my ******* business if and when I have my picture taken?
So: I, embarrassed but resolutely, tell a relative of my fiance this in no uncertain terms a few times when she's milling about, focusing me in a shot. I try to be self-effacing: I mean, I KNOW it's odd, but I damn well expect people who want to be in my life to give me purview over my own ****.
So, one day after one of these anti-pic conversations, we go to the beach - and I take off my top and lay out - she hides, takes a pic of me and posts it in a photo collection site, where other people can see it. In secret and against my expressed will. She defends herself by saying 1. She forgot to delete it before posting, and 2. It was only viewable to family.
I don't give a ****. She never should have taken the picture in the first place - and among her "family" is her granddaughter, who's mother (I hate her) can QUITE easily see. Boobs are not up, but I don't care.
So, I don't even want to talk to her. Ever. I don't fake well. If I'm mad at you, or don't like you - there's no way I can hide it. So, I haven't talked to her. I don't foresee ever feeling differently about this. She did it on purpose. Trust and good will: shattered. If it was a "friend," who'd done this, I'd have said "**** you," and let her drop off the earth. But, she's a very close relation to my fiance, and he really wants this repaired.
This is probably laughable to people - and it's ok: laugh. I almost laugh at the oddity of being so weird about pics - but at the end of the day - if someone you give damn about has this quirk that they tell you - you either care enough about the relationship and their feelings to defer to them - or you don't. I know I defer to a hell of a lot for people I care about.
My fiance has had a lot of crap bubble up in his life recently (child custody horrors) - and I am LOATHE to star in Family Disaster: Part Deux in his life - but goddammit, I am livid. I'm enraged. I've tried to write some type of explanation as to why I'm not talking to her today - because she's sending, "Hey, why aren't you talking to me" emails. But, every time I start a note to her, it winds up really, really nasty and accusatory.
If you were me - what would you do? (getting therapy for weird photo problem is NOT an option...haha) I feel insulted, betrayed and attacked.
and REALLY, REALLY pissed.
