Clingy in 2 weeks... is that healthy?

He's too needy. He's probably extremely jealous and possessive.

Demanding? **** that. You had a neurotic relationship with that knife-boy... learn from it. He wants too much too soon.

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Oh, I said a bad word.

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CL--

Keep an eye out for trouble. Forewarned is forearmed.

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Ok, this time I have my eyes wide open and I have my head held high, nobody is going to walk all over me, I am going to take this each day and if I see anything out of the ordinary I will take a few steps back and then run like hell

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Why not take a few steps back first -- like, now -- and then decide what to do next based on what happens?

My only hesitation here is that you have a history of kind of going with the flow and not really putting your foot down, and if the guy doesn't KNOW you don't like this, he can't really be held accountable for doing it, IMO. Everything you describe could be fine if it was mutual, but it doens't sound particularly mutual. So that's why I am curious about what he does when you put your foot down.

If you say, "I've really been enjoying getting to know you, but things are progressing way too fast for me, so let's cut back on the phone calls and emails, OK? Seeing each other once a week or something is fine, but not more than that for a while," and he says, "Oh, OK," cool. That's not necessarily anything bad (especially if he keeps his word).

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(...and if after a conversation like that he keeps up with the incessant phone calls and emails and stopping by your house to make sure you're OK, that's when it's time to head the other direction, quickly.)

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After all there is a difference between "Getting to Know You" and "Fitting you with a Collar and Leash because I Love You So Much".

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Noddy24 wrote:

After all there is a difference between "Getting to Know You" and "Fitting you with a Collar and Leash because I Love You So Much".

Noddy has a wonderful way with words. CL, you should print these out and tape them to your phone, computer, and front door!

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J_B--

Thanks for the kind words.

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Apparently, the law states there is a difference between "getting to know you," and "following you every day for a week in my car, then sitting outside your house with binoculars every night" as well.

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Crazielady420 wrote:

his friends called him last night and he said he wouldn't go out unless he was with me (then his friend got him to put me on the phone and I said sure)... but when I hung up... I asked him why didn't you go out... his response... I'd rather be with you... but then he got all happy because I wanted to go out and was thanking me... acting like he couldn't go out..

CL, you're a smart girl, to know that these are not good signs.
But I want you to know that these may be (i hope i'm wrong) signs of abusive behavior.
I'm not expert but this is exactly how my husband behaves. And he's abusive. And this clingy behavior seems to me, to be the root of all our problems. Please tread very carefuly here.

Take care

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I am not worried anymore... will explain later when I have the chance!

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<tease> :wink:

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I think I am gonna stick with this one... I have a good feeling... the way he treats me... the way he looks at me... the way he makes me feel... I am sick of being scared and running...

He brought me lunch today and when he left he sent me a text message that said
"seeing you made my day"

Nobody ever says that kind of stuff ever.... he also said it wouldn't matter if I shaved me head or dyed my hair... if I changed anything about the way I look, because his opinion of me would never change... as long as my personality remains, he will still feel the same way about me

Nobody has ever said that either... they are always like... well I dunno...

He likes me for who I am, not what I look like.... but for the person inside... and he means it, more than anyone has ever meant it before...

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Well just try not to get too attached too soon...he sounds like he could get very possessive after a while. Hopefully not though, so good luck with it.

Did you go to the lesbian bar? Makeout with a softball player? I was actually going to bring that girl towards the end of the night, and she was up for it, but we stayed at the first bar the whole time. Pretty much drove right by it on the way home.

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Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:

Well just try not to get too attached too soon...he sounds like he could get very possessive after a while. Hopefully not though, so good luck with it.

No way I am attaching myself lol.... he's now asked me 5 times to be his gf and I still say no.. I am not ready...

Quote:

Did you go to the lesbian bar? Makeout with a softball player? I was actually going to bring that girl towards the end of the night, and she was up for it, but we stayed at the first bar the whole time. Pretty much drove right by it on the way home.

Yea I went lol... we got there and I was telling my friend how gay guys are always hot... and I go.... "you see that gay guy at the end of the bar, now he's hot".... my friend turns to me and goes "that's a woman"...

I froze, turned read, completely embarrassed... half the chicks in there I thought were men... the other half you would never expect to be gay... they were pretty cheerleader types (not to be sterotypical, just no other way to describe)...

I got up on the main stage and danced... it was fun... I explained a bunch of times I was straight... (gay guys knew I was straight right off the bat, not sure why, but one said because I was wearing a cross around my neck, gave it away)... but when I asked a lesbian if I looked straight or gay... she choose gay!

But after awhile I got a little uncomfortable when it was 1:30 and everyone was drunk and basically humping each other in corners and ****...

But it was a good time overall

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You must have been getting hit on a lot by women.

So you think it would be an easy place for what I was looking for?

If I go, I'll be sure to wear an Indigo Girls t-shirt, so I'll be down with "the community."

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Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:

You must have been getting hit on a lot by women.

So you think it would be an easy place for what I was looking for?

If I go, I'll be sure to wear an Indigo Girls t-shirt, so I'll be down with "the community."

No, alot could tell I was straight.... that and I think I made myself seem unapproachable...

But yes... you could find what you are looking for there... there was def. a mix of different kinds of girls...

lol.. yea wear the shirt... and tight jeans..

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CL, if you keep a head on your shoulders you'll be fine. You've been through a lot in the past few years and some of us might worry about you putting blinders on and forgetting the past. Sounds like you're doing great so have a ball!

Did you ever open up to Mr Nice but Going Nowhere? What's his story with the other gf?

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CL--

Quote:

No way I am attaching myself lol.... he's now asked me 5 times to be his gf and I still say no.. I am not ready...

Good!

Savor slowly and hold your dominion.

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Clingy in 2 weeks... is that healthy?

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