If you are interested, don't wait too long, lilar. You don't want him moving on to someone else before you make your move.
Happened to a friend of mine. She was watching this guy, thinking he might be interested, thinking he might ask her out, thinking she might ask him out. She went away for a weekend, he met someone else.
Actually I've had a few silly friends. Another enjoyed a first date with a guy - then couldn't decide how long to wait before calling him to say she'd enjoyed the date - waited so long that he managed to meet someone and get engaged.
That was a mortifying phone call. "Hi, I really had a great time on our date. How have things been for you?" "I'm getting married."
oh wow..
thats pretty sad..
and i was worried about the same thing.. waiting too long...
yeah..
It was sad for her. Funny for those of us who'd spent a decade watching her dither over dates.
Sometimes you just have to decide if you want something enough to do something about it.
Actions speak.
I think it's all a matter of 'face'. For easterners, who from the face-oriented culture, face is the most important thing. Losing face is considered a sin. But that was the old tradition. Nowadays, we, especially young ppl, think that getting what you want is more important. Anyway, how much does a kilo of 'face' cost? I'm sure he'll appreciate your initiave, though he might reject. He'll be proud and happy to be loved. Unless you don't want make your love one so proud and happy. If he reject you should thank the stars above that you knew it early, and you don't have to let the idea--asking him out or not torture you all the time.
(pls forgive my non-native English, and i hope i made myself understood)
Arthur
thanks for the reply.
and yeah.. i kind of did understand what you are trying to say.
more replies. i need more replies! keep them coming![/color]
Arthur-- welcome to A2K! Good post there, I hope you'll be around more.
Go for it, lilar (I like the acronym). The worst that's ever happened to me was that the guy wasn't interested, but was flattered. Guys usually like being asked out, as a general concept.
loveislikearose3 wrote:thanks cyphercat- that was really awesome advice!
first person here that actually helped me .. kind of.
You are a little ingrate.
loveislikearose3 wrote:Cliff Hanger wrote:
You are a little ingrate.
oh umm one more thing- thanks for the advice!
(if you really needed my gratefulness for your posting- here it is!)
i thank everyone who posted an answer!!![/size][/color]
Dear Loveislikeaningrate-- no, it is not a matter of needing, it is a matter of courtesy. Please note: You are the one in need, not the people who are helping you.
Cliff Hanger wrote:loveislikearose3 wrote:thanks cyphercat- that was really awesome advice!
first person here that actually helped me .. kind of.
You are a little ingrate.
Jeez, cliffhanger, it's just that my advice was totally brilliant. Calm down, you can't help not being as insightful and wordly and insegrievious as me-- okay, okay, I'm just teasing in case I didn't make it obvious enough. :wink:
cypher-- I don't mind her ingratitude if it's directed at me. And I can tell just by your avatar and your comments that you are brilliant.
cyphercat wrote:Arthur-- welcome to A2K! Good post there, I hope you'll be around more.
Thanx cyphercat. i didn't feel warm here until you said these words to me. If i come here again that'll be for you.
Arthur, I'm sorry to hear you haven't felt entirely comfortable here. I hope you do give it a try for a while; I didn't feel very welcome here for a time either, but gradually realized there are a lot of nice people and good information here.
It is nice to have people from other cultures here, so I really do hope you keep coming. There aren't too many posting on A2k from Eastern cultures, so stick around and give us another perspective!
Cypher
now im the opposite of what i said earlier. i said i was 70% sure i should go for and 30% against it..
now im the opposite
70% against it, 30% for
guess i did lose faith
but i feel that i should just wait..
not too long though
hmm i want to see.. what do you say?
should i go for it NOW or wait a little while?
please answer!
loveislikearose3, You have no excuse not to ask this guy out except that your nervous and scarred witch is no excuse. Almost everytime this happens when the person finally gets the balls to go through with it the other person says yes and everybody is happy.
But when They don't they never know what could have been. Your cheating yourself. Don't cheat yourself out of life. Don't think about it just do it.
Yup.
GO!
No more advice for you (in soup nazi voice). You don't need it, you're staaaaaling.
