Let's pretend my penis is a jellyfish!

Boomerang has a thread with the same title and thus far the thread has been quite active. So, I'm thinking to myself 'Gus, why don't you pretend that your penis is a jellyfish, record your thoughts and observations, and start a thread?"

I have spent the last several days pretending my penis was a jellyfish.

One of the first things I did was to put a dozen toy boats in my bathtub, filled them with tiny little sailors, and then entered the tub. As the water settled I lay motionless for several minutes to let the miniature boats quick rocking. Everything was quiet. The water was very still and the boats floated in a cluster, almost like an armada at sea.

Then....I made my move. Leaning back on my elbows I slowly raised my jellyfish penis toward the surface. I stopped. Chuckling, I glanced at the unsuspecting armada. Little did the sailors realize that just inches below the surface of the water lay a jellyfish penis.

A quick thrust and the jellyfish penis broke the surface. All hell broke loose! A few boats capsized and the sailors were thrown into the water. One sailor was actually tossed into the clutches of the jellyfish penis. Shifting my hips, I slammed the sailor against the side of the tub. "You're dead!," I shouted with glee.

The game continued on for the rest of the day. By the time I was finished there were boats and sailors strewn all over the bathroom -- on the side of the tub, on the floor, a few of them had actually hit the floor.

One of them was near the door and suddenly my cat's paw shut under the door and snared the sailor. He was gone in a heartbeat. I mimicked his screams and then stood up, dried myself off, and threw the toy boats and soldiers into the wastebasket.

I wiped the water from the floor, got dressed quickly, and headed toward my truck.

As I left the house I noticed my cat curled up in the corner, the toy sailor resting comfortably in his paws.