Psychologists

I'm not saying that people shouldn't see a psychologist, but think critically. Some books might help better.

Oops! Just found out there is an interesting thread about it here:
https://able2know.org/topic/161239-1

Help is a subjective term. There's a myriad of reasons why you haven't felt "helped" by seeing a trained professional about certain issues in your life. Maybe the person you saw was incompetent.

OR

Maybe you didn't want help.
Maybe you disagreed with the methods.
Maybe you just didn't like the person.
Maybe you're skeptical about the whole profession.

Discounting your personal experience versus the millions that have been helped by psychologists only means one thing - - nothing. It means absolutely nothing.

There. Feel better now?

I've met a woman one day who said she saw her psychologist once a week, and each time, she gets out of the meeting deeply upset. Which is a proof the guy wasn't doing his job properly, because it's supposed to be the contrary - coming out of it calmer.

Albert Ellis is recommended.

Who told you THAT? That's a bogus claim.

Some deep seeded issues ARE traumatic. To be told someone has to remain calm is not how therapy works.

I think one school of thought is that when a person is having problems that means their neuroses are breaking down, and the doctor helps bolster them back up. This would be something like taking a tranquilizer.

Another school is thought is that when your neuroses are breaking down, that's the chance to get past the defense mechanisms and affect change.

I'm only personally familiar with the type of therapy called redecision therapy. It's quick, very effective and directed at changing certain behaviors and negative decisions that you made early in your life.

It's a little like hypnosis except that you're not put into a hypnotic state of relaxation. In redecision therapy the emotional state you experience in the course of talking is when you state your redecision. Of course, hypnosis and high emotional states of mind both put you in vulnerable state of suggestion and open-mindedness at which time the repeated redecision or suggestion is stated over and over again.

With hypnosis you would leave the therapy feeling very calm and wonderful because you're in the state of hypnotic relaxation. But after a redecision therapy session you would feel bad because you're in a state of emotional regression and perhaps, drained from the emotional experience.

Of course the effectiveness of hypnosis and redecision therapy depends on the competency of the therapist and how much you trust them. You have to do your shopping.

2 of them just repeated what I would say. I could instead record myself, or write down my thoughts on paper and read it aloud. That last way would cost me much less money.

So you're a competent psychologist in a field of incompetent psychologists, and you're going to diagnose and treat yourself at the same time avoiding one-upmanship. Let us know how that works out.

The problem is:
- the study of pyschology is a science, but
- the application of psychology is an art

because when it comes to application:

- every person is different (values, intelligence, emotional intelligence, personality traits etc); and
- every person needs the same concept explained in different ways (we all comprehend the world through current understanding, previous experiences, specific strong filters and specific senses that are stronger than others); and
- you need someone who connects with you (because you tend to listen more carefully to those you relate to)

The problem isn't the science of psychology.

You missed my point. I do not claim to be 'a competent psychologist'. I do not claim to 'diagnose and treat myself'. I don't mean that I would do it and that it would work. My point is, the two ways seem the same thing to me, except that with paper and a pen it would cost less. If you see any other differences, please tell me.

I guess you say that the psychologist will 'diagnose and treat' me. But that's the problem : they didn't. They just repeated what I say.

Here's how it went with one psychologist:

Me: I am victim of psychological harassment. I wish it wouldn't hurt so much.
Psychologist: You are victim of psychological harassment. You wish it wouldn't hurt so much.

That's it. That's all. No advice. No information.

Cost me 75$.

Here's how it went with another psychologist:

Me: I want to stop getting angry; it makes me lose my friends.
Psychologist: You have to stop getting angry, Yalow! It's making you lose your friends!

That's it. That's all. No advice. No information.

Cost me 75$.

Try re-decision therapy. It works best at changing behavior, and it's very quick. It helps that you know the behavior you wish to change.

However, you'll have to do some research to find a clinical psychologist who practices this technique.

Maybe she was provoking me. Maybe she wanted me to say more about it.

So, how do you feel about that?

Feel I should have talked more!

Why not try a slightly different approach, and tell them what you want from them, meaning, something like "Can you please help me understand why I am angry all the time?" or "Can you please help me understand why I get so angry and minor things?"....ie. ask them to help you with something specific.

By the way, reflecting is supposed to be a way that helps gain empathy with the other person, so that eventually trust develops, and the person opens up. Openning up, if the person is very closed off, can take a while, which means if they were trying this, they may never have gotten to the questions they really wanted to ask.

Thanks for the advice and information!