Disabled roommate wants to move with me and other roommate

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I live in a condo with two roommates. We have recently been given notice to move out next month. So we’ve been scrambling to find a new place to live. Roommate 1 is disabled and in a wheelchair. So we’ve been looking for a place that is accessible. The problem is all those places are very expensive now.

Roommate 1 did find a place that is just barely in our price range that is accessible. The problem is it only has two bedrooms so two of us will have to share a room. Roommate 2 and I are not happy with this. We have until the end of the week to make a decision. If we don’t find another place by then though we will have to take it.

Yesterday roommate 2 found a really affordable place. It’s really nice and spacious 2 bedroom. The owner is will to give us a good deal on it if we take care of keeping the apartment buildings common areas clean. However this place is also definitely not handicapped accessible. Roommate 2 wants me to move with him and basically leave roommate 1 on his own.

I have very conflicted feelings about this because it feels wrong to leave him in the lurch on such short notice. However going with roommate 2 would put me in a much better financial position. I would finally be able to actually put some money away each month instead of living paycheck to paycheck. I also guess it wouldn’t be us putting him on short notice. Roommate 2 says it’s our current landlord that really put everyone on notice and its not our fault nor are we required to stick together. Plus its different since Roommate 2 and I have been friends for years and we only met roommate 1 when he moved in last year.

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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 872 • Replies: 8

[+3] - engineer - 03/23/2022Or, and this sounds horribly unfair, your roommate could pay more. Places should be accessible, but if those places are more, you are effectively subsidizing his rent. If he made it more...

@bluedesert,

Well, this is a difficult one. Do you owe Roommate 1 anything? Not really, but given you've been roommates a while and the lack of notice, it's tricky - more of a moral issue. Is there any way you can help Roommate 1 find his own accommodation? Could you let him move in to your new abode temporarily? I think I would do everything in my power to help out Roommate 1 but you guys need to have a conversation about this. Does he have any family who could help him?

Why the short eviction notice, by the way? Usually they have to give about 3 months.

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@Mame,

I’ve been looking, but all the single places are out of his price range.

He can’t move in with us even temporarily because the new place roommate 2 found is not handicap accessible at all. It has a big flight of stairs you have to go up to reach it and no elevator.

Tbh I don’t know him that well, so I don’t know much about his family.

I’m not sure why the short notice. I did look it up though and where we live landlords only have to give a month notice.

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@bluedesert,

Well, essentially it's his problem, sorry to say. I know you feel a little responsible (and who wouldn't?), but are you really? I think the soonest you tell him, the better. Offer to help him find another place... but really, you have to live your life.

We can't be responsible for everyone in our lives. Maybe his family could assist? Or is there some govt agency that can help? Helping him explore all options could mean a lot to him and actually help him, also not to feel abandoned.

My 84 year old mom was paying $2250/month and then a friend told her about the Kiwanis Lodge. She applied and got a larger room for $450/month. There are agencies out there that might be able to help your roommate.

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@Mame,

Yeah, I guess I’ll tell him today and help him do some research. Thanks

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I was kind of wondering like what Mame said - usually there is help for those that are disabled - because like you said - typically to have a place to rent that is also accessible for the disabled would be more expensive. Are you living in the US and if so which state? I would think if you do a search for housing assistance disabled in your state you might find some help. Or if outside the US do a similar search for your country.

Maybe this could be a situation where you find help for your disabled roommate and also be able to take the lower priced rental for the other two of you.

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@Linkat,

Or, and this sounds horribly unfair, your roommate could pay more. Places should be accessible, but if those places are more, you are effectively subsidizing his rent. If he made it more affordable for the other two of you, that might work. Of course, this penalizes him for being handicapped, but it might be better than the alternative.

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@engineer,

engineer wrote:

Or, and this sounds horribly unfair, your roommate could pay more. Places should be accessible, but if those places are more, you are effectively subsidizing his rent. If he made it more affordable for the other two of you, that might work. Of course, this penalizes him for being handicapped, but it might be better than the alternative.

Good point - do you know the handicapped roommate's financial situation? Could something like that be arranged? In one way - maybe it is a situation where this roommate gets a bigger room to compensate.

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@engineer,

Great points.

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Disabled roommate wants to move with me and other roommate

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