Tue 5 Nov, 2019 01:40 pm
I really don't know what to do. I don't really know who to ask either and I thought than an anonymous forum would be the perfect place to start.
I am 16 and I had a boyfriend, who now became my absolute best friend. He is a few years older (he's 18) and started college in another country (we live in Europe). He is really mature for his age and I know for a fact he would never do anything to hurt me. Our families get along really well too! We talk every day, often call too. We are really comfortable talking about our past relationship (we broke up Feb.2019) and one day, between jokes and jokes the idea of having sex together somehow came up.
We talked a lot about it, both kinda wanting to go for it. We never had sex when we were together because I was a bit scared and he always told me that it was absolutely no problem, that he would wait as long as it took because he wanted me to be comfotable with it. I know I want my first time to be special and with someone I trust entirely and he would definitely be a good partner for it. It's not his first time, so he does kind of know how it goes and when I told him about my fears he kindly sat down with me and explained everything I needed to know. He said that if I wasn't sure about doing it then it was completely fine, that it did not have to be rushed and that he completely understood.
We made sure none of us had feelings for each other anymore and we realized that this would only be a one time thing.
I asked him some things about it, how does it feel? How was your first time? What about before and after? But there were some things I really didn't dare to ask. (Eg: do girls have to shave down there? Do I have to uhm do something to him before we start?) I don't want to touch this subject with my parents as it is quite awkward and since I don't want them thinking less of him.
Please please please I am begging for your help.
What gives me pause is that you are planning this as a "one time thing". Sex involves strong emotions , some of them chemical. You may regret not having your partner around to explore these feelings.
I would recommend that your first sexual relationship be a little more solid.