My God, if I ever got this involved in my children's lives, they'd look at me like I had two heads.
We got invited to my daughter's wedding (she lives 3,000 miles away) - I walked her down the aisle but had nothing to do with anything else, including her dress. She asked me what I was going to wear, I told her and she said, Fine.
That's how we roll in our family. Of course, if they ASK for opinions or suggestions, we're there, but otherwise, we hope (and believe) we've raised responsible, independent adults.