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Legit concern or over thinking?

 
 
Keryxo
 
Reply Tue 18 May, 2021 07:26 pm


Have been seeing casually this guy, we usually text when we arrange to meet so the last time he was at my place brought some nice wine but didn't have opener so it stayed with me. He wrote me on his way home and I replied but didn't write smth requesting a response. I wrote to him again that I tried the wine and it's pretty good but he didn't reply yet (I noticed that he hasn't watched my stories today although he was one of the first to do). We are working together for a project which he shared his credentials with me to follow up so we are still connected. I'd have to enter and work on it but I'm embarassed after sending that message. Is he genuinely busy or slowly fading out? Many times we double text each other so don't think he'd mind me leaving that message but can't be sure and don't want to get paranoid about it.
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Type: Question • Score: 4 • Views: 525 • Replies: 11
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Malcomap
 
  0  
Reply Tue 18 May, 2021 07:49 pm
@Keryxo,
Overthinking it.......its a personal pet peeve of mine when I text people and they don't reply. So, I get the feeling but most people who I text, I am not in a romantic relationship with. It's just a pet peeve when they don't reply in a timely fashion, from man to man I can tell you he must be busy or just haven't gotten to around you yet. How long ago did you text him?
Keryxo
 
  0  
Reply Tue 18 May, 2021 07:58 pm
@Keryxo,
Around 9pm and its passed midnight. Usually he replied within 30-40minutes and up until yesterday watching my stories almost as soon as I posted them. Today I've been quite active and he hasn't watched any. I know he didn't yet open the message cause the notification is not there (ectra level over thinking). Is just unlike him to go MIA all of a sudden. Two days ago we were kissing and cuddling at my place.
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Keryxo
 
  0  
Reply Tue 18 May, 2021 08:02 pm
@Malcomap,
And if he's busy I feel awful don't want to intrude his private space don't want him to think that I freaked out he hasn't reached to me, I said casually "very fine wine, I'm impressed" and send a picture when I just opened it. We talked about wines and he knows I'm a huge fan of good quality ones so I thought maybe he'd expected my feedback. I could have said it in person but truth is I got a bit worried not hearing from him and tried to drop a dm to break the ice.
0 Replies
 
Keryxo
 
  0  
Reply Wed 19 May, 2021 01:00 am
@Malcomap,
Okay he opened my message but hasn't replied. Also he didn't watch my stories either like normally (even when he wasn't replying he'd watch them) so I hope he's busy and not going to ghost me. Oh man, hate this shouldn't have texted.
Joeblow
 
  1  
Reply Wed 19 May, 2021 09:24 am
@Keryxo,
Oh my goodness, of course you should have. He left a lovely bottle of wine and you spent the night cuddling. You're a nice person, yes? You'd like to see him again, yes? Please stop stressing. You're good.
Keryxo
 
  0  
Reply Wed 19 May, 2021 12:33 pm
@Joeblow,
Thank you I thought so too. But this morning I checked and he opened the message but didn't reply. Also, he stopped watching my stories since yesterday. He offered me his netflix credentials and I'm still watching normally so I'm guessing he hasn't creeped out to change the password hahaha. At least I got some free access and a nice bottle of wine. Isn't that a sign of wanting no interaction? I know that he considers me a nice person it was just a sudden shift on his behaviour so far that freaked me out which coincided with my message. I mean first he stopped watching then I texted him not that I wanted to draw attention but since he gifted me a an expensive wine and netflix I thought I could acknowledge it and be a little flirty without being pushy. Is this a standard male behaviour when a guy stops stresses about the girl and chills or someone who lost interest and jumped on to the next? I know it'd sound typical but I thought we had a connection cuddling long time after sex and we did it like 3-4 times. Idk, I'm confused maybe he's going through stmth and doesn't feel like talking or just feels im being too much with texting (in 3 days I texted like once about the wine my previous message was goodnight normal).
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Wed 19 May, 2021 05:41 pm
Sounds like he wants to keep it casual. Sounds like you thought this was something more.

Iā€™m sorry, but you just experienced his definition of ā€œ casual.ā€

Keryxo
 
  0  
Reply Wed 19 May, 2021 06:05 pm
@PUNKEY,
Alright, does this means I'd hear from him at some point? And could I inititate a booty call in few days?
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2021 06:46 pm
Holy Jesus.
I go days sometimes before replying to someone.
I must have a number of ppl sitting up at night obsessing over me
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2021 10:32 pm
@Keryxo,
Stop overthinking this whole thing.

If you had a LIFE, he'd be a small part of it. But since you seemingly don't, you're obsessing. STOP IT.

Who knows what he's thinking? Nobody. Maybe it's not even about you. Maybe he got bad news, or some extra work... why do we always make it about ourselves?

Just go on and live your life. You put it out there - if he wants to receive it, he can. Otherwise, onto your next moment.

Please... whatever comes out of someone's mouth is all about them. If nothing does - point taken.

You're better than this guessing game.
Keryxo
 
  1  
Reply Sat 22 May, 2021 02:20 pm
@Mame,
Totally agree with you. I've been stressed at work and it made things worse in my head. I'm just going to the negative that he lost interest entirely. He replied eventually that he was busy and I told him it's all good and wished him nice weekend but didn't respond again. So, I'll let it ne and stop obsessing about it. Shown my interest so if he wants to meet knows where to find me, don't want to force anything.
0 Replies
 
 

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