JUST HAD SEX FOR THE FIRST TIME! PLEASE HELP!

Because if you use it more than once in 3 months it can screw up your hormones....

Taking EC is like a brick to your hormonal system - your body needs that kind of shock to make it reject

What is all this about Rape Crisis Line??? She was not raped, she consented and chances are she wasn't the ONLY one drunk. She needs to accept responsibility for her OWN actions and not ruin somebody else's entire life by accusing them of rape, just to save face with her parents!

Worry about being pregnant, HELL! Pregnancy is about the best of what can come from unprotected sex!
Be up front with your Dr. when you go have your pregnancy test so he/she knows to test for other things too!

Don't beat yourself up, EVERYONE makes mistakes, that makes you human. Granted this is a biggie, but you will get through it no matter how things turn out. Just don't falsely accuse when you know yourself they are not guilty.
Good luck to you!

Actually the drug Mifepristone (RU-486, The Morning After Pill, The Abortion Pill, etc...) is being used in medical studies for both cancer and AIDS.
I just completed a study and I took 3 pills a day for a month and it showed no ill effect whatsoever on me.

Thank you for saying what should have been said before. I agree that she should take responsibility. Just because you are drunk does not give you a free pass to do what you want and then pretend you "couldn't help yourself" later when it backs up on you.

Your right, it should be said.

But she's only 18 and clearly wasnt planning it.
How many single people just beginning to discover sex wake up and think 'Oh, Il need a condom today'.

Im sure we've all been there at some point in our lives.
How many people stop once they have got the urge.

She came here for help not criticism.

No one advised her to accuse anyone of rape. People who answer the phones at rape crises lines also advise people about what testing they should have done as well as offering counseling that someone who is taking responsibility for making a big mistake but might still feel like **** might need.

I'm all about responsibility - I'm just not one to pass judgement and refuse to offer someone who admits they made a big mistake some sympathy and concrete steps to take.

That's the problem. She didn't think. And now she regrets it. And everyone here wants to say poor girl....Don't get me wrong, I do feel bad that she has to deal with this but....There is nothing that any one can say that will take that regret away. And she needs to learn how to live with the consequences of her actions.

Wanna know what the problem is with kids today? They are coddled and aren't expected to take responsibility for what they do at a young age and then when they get older and make mistakes, they aren't the kind of mistakes you just bounce back from. They are the kind like this. She's old enough to know the consequences of drinking and unprotected sex. Now she has to deal with it. It might be harsh and mean but the world isn't as forgiving as we'd like it to be and now she's seen that her actions do have consequences. It's really a shame that it took this to make her see that.

I agree but its happened now, in the past, been and gone, she needs help.
Plenty of grown ups act irresponsibly.

I have no doubt she will learn from this.

Clearly. But that doesn't excuse her. If she is old enough to drink and have sex she's old enough to deal with what comes after. Plain and simple.

I know. And I would bet that they were the kids who didn't ever have to deal with the consequences of their actions.

After reading some of the comments I can not believe how judgmental some can be. Why would someone get on here to make up a story, sounds like she got on here for some serious advice.

I am sorry this happened, does not sound like rape to me just a night that you will probably regret the rest of your life. But you will get past it in time, there are many things in your life you will do that you will regret this is just one of them. The sooner you learn to deal with bad choices the better off you will be. We all make choices we look back on and wonder what the hell were we thinking or doing but you have to put it in the past and move on, learn from the mistakes don't beat your self up over them.

I have no doubt she will learn from this.[/quote]

As above.

Not being judgmental. Just saying in big loud words that people need to be held accountable. Make a mistake, own it and learn from it.

And yes, people do come here with fake stories. Been done in the past and it's despicable.

But in situations like this one would almost hope that she was lying.

I did not suggest to speak with a rape crisis center, however, some one did mention rufies (sp?), which is a date rape drug. If the story is true - it does sound like rufies as she cannot remember even sex with 2 other men - that other people at the party said happened to her.

Whether rufies were involved or not, it is possible that the other 2 men may have raped her. Being drunk she could have passed out and they took advantage of the situation. If she does not remember, either because of too much alcohol or rufies being slipped to her - it would be doubtful to prosecute any way, but she still could get help at a rape crisis center.

Whether you do something stupid or not - you cannot tell me that not one of you responding saying she needs to take responsibility for her actions never did anything stupid before - does not mean that men should have taken advantage of her while she was unable to make a sane decision for herself.

Of course not. You are misreading me. No one deserves anything bad happening to them. If she was in fact drugged or raped, she didn't deserve it, even if she was laying naked int he middle of the room with a big sign that said "Free Sex".

What I am saying is the pity party has to end. She needs to own what happened and take steps to over come it. Responsibility isn't just taking what happened and forgetting it. It's owing your mistake, learning from it and growing from it.

If she was raped, counseling is important and she needs to understand that it wasn't her fault, no matter what she did. But she also needs to understand that by being irrisponsible she unknowingly allowed someone to take advantage of her. That is the accountability I am talking about. Saying, "What happened to me was wrong and it wasn't my fault that other people took advantage of me. But I know now that bad things can happen to me when I am not responsibile for myself. I know that I can prevent things like this from happening in the future if I take the responsibility of taking care of me." Does that make sense? I don't know if I am explaining it well.

Bella - I get what you're saying - and I would hope that her honestly relating what happened and asking for advice about what to do is a beginning step in owning and taking accountability for her mistake. I'd agree with you 100% if this wasn't the first time she had had sex. I think that's a key piece of information. Having taught highschool, I can honestly tell you there are some l8 year olds who are old hands at sex and all the attendant games that go on and there are some who may as well be babies for all the experience they have. I'm not trying to guess which type she is - maybe she's somewhere in the middle - she probably is - but I still feel bad for her.

I've made sexual mistakes myself - mostly around the time I was l8 or l9 and just beginning to be sexually active. It takes a while to get your head around what it all will mean in the larger scheme of things, and so you put yourself in situations that maybe aren't the best or smartest. I think if this has really scared the **** out of her - she'll probably learn a pretty big lesson.

But I still think it's important to have someone to talk to and I think it makes more sense to talk to someone who's trained than to strangers on an internet forum.

And for the record, to the other chick -having never been raped, I don't know for sure - but if I were going to report a rape or accuse someone of rape - I would call the cops-not a rape crisis hotline.

Bella - what you say makes perfect sense.

I you go back and read my posting, I was NOT judgemental. I told her that mistakes make her human. But that she needed to accept responsibility for her OWN actions. I'm not saying that a situation like this is the girl's problem and not the guy's. Unfortunately, it is the girl that will face the majority of the repercussions of unprotected sex, and rather than a "well, HE'S just as responsible" attitude, she needs to assume full responsibility for her own safety and well being. And I know that in cases of rape, etc... that she is pretty much defenceless with this.
When I said that she can't just go crying rape to save face with her family, I did NOT mean to imply that if it was rape to just get over it. If that's the case, prosecute the ba$tard!
She is the only one who knows exactly how much and what exactly she remembers from that night and she just needs to be sure that how she deals with this is justifiable.
When the subject of Rape Crises came up, it was never said "just for counselling because they are experienced" and when an 18 year old girl that is emotionally worn down and terrified at the "what ifs" and "My parents will kill me" and they hear "Rape Crises" it could very easily seem like a way to come out of it saving face. And I'm not accusing this girl of that, but I'm certainly going to say it to make sure she realizes how wrong it would be.

Bella, you are 100% correct about kids today. They are not held accountable for their actions and Dad and/or Mom yell and scream and bail them out of their problem, and the kids know that and it's a fair price to pay for irresponsibility and laziness.

I truly do wish the very best for this young lady and hopefully this will end up just being a huge scare and a valuable life lesson.

I don't think mrradio is the person who mentioned rape, but one of the responders did. It may well not be what happened, she may have had way too much alcohol.
On the other hand, amnesia or partial amnesia is one of the components of the situation when Rophynol is used for date rape, and people should be aware of it, since one can only test for it in the system for something like 48 hours.

I think mrradio can be helped to recover from the event - to both heal and learn from it - by seeing a counseller.

wannabearoyal - (I hope I got it right)- I believe I was the one who first mentioned rape crisis - and if you read carefully, you will see that I said, "Whether you believe you were raped or not... there are people there who are trained to provide advice and counseling to women in your situation...advise about testing... but also... "you get it, keep reading.

If she's afraid to tell her parents, which she stated that she was, she needs some adult to talk to. It would be nice if that adult was a trained counselor.

Of course it may just all be a big joke - I mean did she ever come back? And then we'll all have gotten into this big tizzy for nothing...

And yeah, I agree, kids today....