Jealousy at its worst/ And I need a good bitch session!

I have to laugh at you Roger, thats exactly what I told him over a week ago. That I would throw his **** out in the yard for the buzzards to pick over!

I feel better this evening, I talked to him again. I actually kept my cool this time and didn't twist off. I told him again how I felt. He talked to me this time, instead of hanging his head. Said that he saw the way she acted and that he was sorry. And Sorry that I felt that way. (Didn't apologize for his behavior) That he could actually see some of what I was saying. (theres much more to this previous connversation than I have told)

I feel better for venting...(now) And proud that I held my tongue and didn't come untrained as I had previously.

I just demand the same respect, if not more than any other woman that he comes in contact with. I have earned it .....

I asked him about that, he said that he swears that he hasn't mentioned my feelings to her. HUMM.....? Maybe he hasn't. He mentioned that he noticed her being in a pissy mood here lately. Hummm, AGain? I have felt that its been a game...but like I mentioned earlier, there's alot more to it, and one more person involved. I just hate to go completely into it, for fear of THEM stumbling upon this thread. But I feel that I have been pushed out of the "Friendship"...and she has taken my "spot". And she knows it.

Ha, Thanks ehBeth

I'm trying to bite my tongue, till I have solid proof...if there is any. Like I mentioned earlier...there is one more involved and I happen to think the world of the person and trying to spare feelings...as of right now.

You DAMN SKIPPY. I'm a very blunt person, what I think is usually on my mind and I have had a HARD time keeping my mouth shut.

Makemeshiver, I agree with what Roger said...and show your husband that you mean business!

It depends on how far you want to take this, MMS. Something tells me that perhaps your husband ENJOYS the thought of being "wanted" by 2 women. Perhaps it makes him feel very, very, desirable? If it's making you as unhappy as I think it is, maybe he should be required to choose?: His marriage or his office fantasy? Or maybe YOU should do the choosing about what YOU want? But, obviously, don't do anything in haste, OK? Good luck, you deserve better than this nonsense!

gotta wonder what the kids think about the goings on

and they'll have noticed. kids do. they're usually hyper-vigilant about stuff involving parents and others.

What we have here, msolga, is a failure to communicate.

What I meant to suggest was that she point out, and clearly, is that "No, her husband is NOT wanted by two women." I guess I was guilty of ambiguity. Sorry for the confusion.

Maybe I'm the confused one here, Roger? This situation strikes a sensitive chord with me.

Oh mms.......... you are truely beautiful. I'm not just saying that to make you feel good, either. You posted a pic on this forum somewhere and I still remember it.

You are HOT ........and if he doesn't appreciate that - he needs glasses.

BIG HUG

mms, the keeping your cool when actually talking to him after venting here is a prime function of venting. That always really helps me, if I just kinda go "blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" without worrying about what I'm saying too much, to someone not involved, and that helps me keep my cool and say what I want to say to the person who is involved.

So vent away.

mms--

You got the best of both words. Your explosion focused his attention. He noticed that you thought there was a problem. The second, less dramatic exchange, indicates solutions may be possible.

Vent if venting is needed. Hold your dominion.

Totally agree with that being the purpose of venting. It helps you separate out what the true issues are and helps you organize your thoughts so that you can clearly communicate your feelings to the other.

It sounds like he has a conscience, so hopefully some of the fairy dust is wearing off. Her being pissy could actually work in your favor.

I appreciate each ones thoughts...THank YOU!

Yea..I held my temper yesterday. I was very proud of it. I just explained to him what was bothering me..AGAIN. I told him that I wished that he could be in my shoes and had been there for the past year and half and then he'd see things my way. I'm glad I vented...

I don't believe there is a full fledge affair. What I think is...he is infatuated with her. So much so..that he can't hide it in front of me. I have seen the looks, the smiles...etc. He's ready to lend a helping hand the minute one is needed...and I can't even get him to haul off the trash.

She is woman...us women, usually see these things and hardly go unnoticed. Therefore, I find her guilty on that part. Some lil part of her is enjoying it and she knows its probably eating me up. And I have tried not to show my true feelings when around. I have sat back like the cat...and just watched...and kept my mouth shut...waiting.

But enough..is enough. And a couple of weeks ago..week and half ago...however long ago it was...I blew. Too many coincidences to contend with and that was IT.

Like I said...he didn't deny it. But...thats him. He's not a talker, especially if I find him in the wrong. When I laid out all the things I have sat and watched, the way things were put across to me, his actions, hers...I asked him, "What else do you think I would believe after seeing and hearing all that?" He just shook his head. I Told him to put the shoe on the other foot for awhile.

I guess I'm here for the duration. I won't just up and leave over petty jealousy. But give me solid proof and its history.

As for my boys, I honestly don't think they noticed anything. Yes...they are keen. But I have hidden my feelings in front of them and things like this are not discussed with them in the house. Life to them goes on........

The only thing I worry about now, is...What if there was more to it...and now they know how I feel, they hid it better? Thats in the back of my mind.

And the other thing I worry about to some extent is...Is this just something that I have blowed out of poportion? Or is what my gut telling me right? I just don't believe I would feel this way for the hell of it..why make myself miserable?

No, always trust your gut. Something's up. It may not have gone all the way to affair, but it certainly sounds like it was heading there.

And don't worry. There's just no hiding affairs for long. If they're up to no good, you'll catch them soon enough.

Thats what I kinda think too Freeduck.

My other fear is this...what happens if the relationship she is in now..collapses? I feel he'll be the one to "console" her. He made mention to me last night in our conversation that he thought things weren't too great at the moment with THEM...I just dread the day...

Bottom line...you know your man.

Yes eoe...I do know him......too well. I wish I could say the same thing for him, cause he doesn't know me that well, even after all these years. And I have told him that too........

Ohhh MMS, I'm so sorry to hear you going through this. I know that feeling and there's nothing good about it.
From what I've seen in a lot of your posts through the months is that you don't sound happy at all with your husband and I also know how hard it is to live with that. Constantly craving affection from a husband who won't give it really sucks and I know that too.
I know it's hard to move on, but you are such a sweet person and you need to look out for your happiness. I know I'd leave a man who treated me this way because life it way too short to settle. You deserve to be treated like the beautiful woman you are!

(((Big Hugs)))

Good Women question themselves and lean over backwards to be dispassionate and "fair":



Sounds to me as though you may have diverted trouble from your front yard to her front yard.

Lord save us from the Norsemen and from all the women who complicate our marriages with their marital problems!

Hold your dominion.

That's right.
Hold your dominion.

MMS....You deserve so much better than this. What he is doing is completely dishonouring you and completely dishonouring your marriage. It's hard to have any respect for man who is not honourable.

As was already mentioned, it may NOT be a full blown affair yet, but it definitely sounds like it could be headed that way. You have your eyes wide open and I wouldn't close them one minute if I were you....not on this situation

You are such a strong, warm, compassionate, beautiful woman. I can't imagine why he has sunk into complacency and let himself drift off into fantasyland. He could never do better than you....