boomerang wrote:Wow dlowan, that Perry article was fascinating. A bit over my head in many parts but so much of it reminded me of things I've thought and things I've posted since all of this really started up with Mo -- back when I started the "Separation Anxiety" thread.
When a traumatized child is in a state of alarm (because they are thinking about the trauma, for example) they will be less capable of concentrating, they will be more anxious and they will pay more attention to 'non-verbal' cues such as tone of voice, body posture and facial expressions
I'm wondering if this "thinking about the trauma" is what has been going on and Mo has just figured out how to clue me into his thoughts. This whole thing really started after that crazy visit from his mom -- that's when I started really questioning "typical" and made the decision to talk to his doctor about his behavior....
In a very real sense, traumatized children exhibit profound sensitization of the neural response patterns associated with their traumatic experiences. The result is that full-blown response patterns (e.g., hyperarousal or dissociation) can be elicited by apparently minor stressors.
Like going to the carwash with his mom?
Maybe like wanting to be helped out of the wheelbarrow?
despite being distanced from threat and the original trauma, the stress-response apparatus of the child's brain is activated again and again
This is due to the fact that, simply stated, the child is in a persisting fear state (which is now a 'trait'). Furthermore, this means that the child will very easily be moved from being mildly anxious to feeling threatened to being terrorized.
.... and how things escalate?
Children who have been traumatized and have developed a 'sensitized' hyperarousal or 'sensitized' dissociative pattern will often use this freezing mechanism when they feel anxious. This is often labeled oppositional-defiant behavior. The child will feel anxious due to an evocative stimulus to which their sensitized neural systems are reacting (e.g., a family visit). They are often not aware of the evocative nature of a given event, but what they do experience -- deeply -- is anxiety. At this point, they tend to feel somewhat out of control and will cognitively (and often, physically) freeze. When adults around them ask them to comply with some directive, they may act as if they haven't heard or they "refuse". This forces the adult -- a teacher, a parent, a counselor -- to give the child another set of directives. Typically, these directives involve more threat. The adult will say, "If you don't do this, I will...". The nonverbal and verbal character of this 'threat' make the child feel more anxious, threatened and out of control. The more anxious the child feels, the quicker the child will move from anxious to threatened, and from threatented to terrorized
... and maybe explain some of the new reacations to his family?
.... and to why time out and cause/effect things don't work so well for us?
There are a number of clear implications of a neurodevelopmental approach to the maltreated child (Appendix I: Key Points: Clinical Work with Maltreated Infants). The first relates to the misunderstanding of resilience. We often hear "Children are resilient," or "They'll get over it, they didn't even know what was happening." It is not uncommon for adults to relate the traumatic events to clinicians in the presence of the child as if they were invisible. Often, recounting the event, the adults will describe how the traumatic event was terrifying for them, but as they describe the child's reactions they frequently misunderstand the child's unattached, non-reactive behaviors as 'not being effected' rather than the 'surrender' response. This pervasive, destructive view of caretaking adults in a young child's life exacerbates the potential negative impact of trauma. Of course, children 'get over it' -- they have no choice. Children are not resilient, children are malleable. In the process of getting over it, elements of their true emotional, behavioral, cognitive and social potential are diminished -- some percentage of capacity is lost, a piece of the child is lost forever.
Persistence of the destructive myth that 'children are resilient' will prevent millions of children, and our society, from meeting their true potential
I imagine that this is what the counselor meant by "you can only go forward".
Boomer - when we read that article some years ago, everyone I work with, and the group I was doing my infant mental health degree with, went "AHAAAAAAAA"!
It was epiphanous - it made such absolute sense of all that we had seen in the kids (and adults) we work with - most of whom are very traumatised.
Louise Newman, a very prominent NSW psychiatrist and researcher and infant mental health specialist proudly refers to herself as "the baby snatcher" because she advocates so strongly for babies to be removed from abusive or extremely neglectful homes NOW - not years later, after god knows how many futile efforts to assist the family, when the kids are are almost irrevocably damaged, and will very likely go on to repeat the abuse with THEIR kids - or to REALLY invest in intensive and long-term assistance to these families - not the piecemeal crap that currently exists in this country, at least.
I would say "yes" to all your wonderings above. Remember, Mo is in an optimal situation.
Also remember that he has unconscious memories of his experiences - (along with conscious ones that he may also have) - they are embedded, as it were, in his mind and body - this means he may well become traumatised by triggers that neither he, nor you, can make sense of.
This is why I advised you to back up in the wheelbarrow incident - not that anyone but you and he knew whether he was in a truly overwhelmed state then, so only your "gut" (or attuned) feelings would know and be your guide. The only thing with gut feelings is to be sure we are not reacting to some of our own projections.
Think of this - some babes had their wee heart rates monitored when they had their first baths - in loving, competent hands. Their wee heart rates went up to unbelievable heights - this experience was enormously stressful to them.
Imagine an early life of such stresses in incompetent, unattuned, or outright abusive hands. Then add in abuse, neglect, or a violent situation, or maternal depression.....
Makes Abu Ghraib seem a pretty accurate comparison, no?
This is why this field is my passion - though I work with toddlers up, mostly, rather than babies - attempting to repair relationships and what we can of trauma.
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