the wake

Sitting quietly, too.

Yeah. I keep hovering around this thread, and the hospital thread, and checking out others but they seem too contentious or trivial -- I keep wanting to say to people, don't you realize Cav died yesterday??? -- and not wanting to offend people who do know, and wondering if there are people who don't know, and...

I think that some of the people I'm thinking of really might not know, maybe I'll post links around more.

I woke this morning never expecting to find such sadness hovering over my room.
Cav was A2k for me. The first to greet me and make me feel at home. My music buddy, the punster. All the good times are reeling by in a blur.

It seems unfair
That I should care
About a clown I never met
Someone who loved life
And shunned the strife that
Makes us seem so small

I strive to dress and
Do the things that matter
But they don't matter at all
It seems unfair that I should care
About a friend I never met.

Having signed the Guestbook (thanks for pointin' it out, ehBeth), not much else to do other than hang out here a bit, wishin', with everyone else, there was somethin' that could be said to make it better, wishin' there was no reason for any of us to be here.

G'night, Cav. Sleep well. See ya later.

I came as soon as I heard. I don't know what to say, so I won't say anything.

Just reading along right now. Too sad to say much.

Dreamt of Cav last night. We were all in a pub, laughing and talking, happy and rather raucus. (Irish pub style, so perhaps we had all gathered in Boston - the place was packed) Glasses were raised on a couple of ocassions, though I didn't catch the toasts over the chattering and whooping. Didn't matter. We all joined in. I knew everyone there was from A2K, and those whose faces I couldn't place remained turned away from me although I knew their A2K names. Then Cav said he had to get home. Had a show to do in the morning. We all got louder in attempts to encourage him to stay. He was smiling and thanking everyone. Lots of hugging and cheek kissing, and patting of backs. He opened the door and turned to wave with a big smile. We raised our glasses and saluted "Eat ****!" which made him laugh.

I woke up crying and laughing. Odd feeling of not knowing which to do.

I just got back from an extended weekend and heard the news. I am so sad. Cav will truely be missed.

I just heard this morning. I still haven't taken it in yet. So sad. So sad.

I am stunned and saddened by this news. Cavfancier was a true mensch, which is about the highest compliment I can pay to anyone. My condolences to his family and friends. He will truly be missed.

Squinney, the pic I posted earlier in the thread was at the end of an evening much like the one you dreamt about. Great, laughing memories.

This cannot be happening....

I just simly cant believe this. He was so yng, and so full of life.

How can this happen ?

g, for what it's worth, I was so happy that you were going to see him -- the kind of thing lots of us wanted to do and you were actually doing it.

And that goes double for ehBeth and BoGoWo of course, who were able to actually see him. Thanks, guys.

eBeth - He was dressed and looked in my dream like the pic you posted. I must have kept that image as I went to sleep.

I woke up this morning hoping against hope that this was all a bad dream.

I wish I'd had your dream, squinney.

Cav sites
This is only one of the google sites you can find if you enter Chef Paul Mesbur:

http://members.tripod.com/mesbur_paul/newrecipesite/

BBB

I can't believe it...Cav was such a great guy. You'll be missed, buddy.

No, it is worth nothing. He was forced to go before I came, this is so unfair.

I remember over on abuzz once. I was in the middle of some argument (probably about evolution-duhh) and cav wrote a post that said
Youre just not having enough fun in your argument.Try to relax"
Hes been my hero ever since. You can never have enough fun in whatever you do, even washing the dog. Im gonna remember cav from that viewpoint.Im gonna try to practice his philosophy and to anyone who says otherwise "EAT ****"

At the expene of derailing an otherwise solemn moment.
Wouldnt cav have had something neat to say about this whole turnout?

For Cav


The hallowed halls of a2k
Will never be the same
A part of you remains here still
In spirit and in name

We'll resurrect your avatar
The witty poetic clown
And place it in the golden vault
For it belongs to you alone

The recipe now incomplete
The melody all wrong
We miss the Cav we've come to know
An ingredient is gone

Your written words upon the pages
Binging smiles so sincere
As laughter lingers
It will whisper
And say that you're still here