Eva wrote: BorisKitten wrote:
Men like this have a different definition of love than the rest of us.
Maybe, but I prefer to think that some people just don't know HOW to love.
Is that not what Boris said?
With all respect, duce, no...it isn't. I was speaking of the difference between love as a noun and love as a verb. Some people have feelings of love (as a noun), but don't know how to behave (verb). So their relationships are always messed up.
Is that more clear?
Eva, you're absolutely right. I did mean to say that this man THINKS he loves her, but he is not CAPABLE of love.
I don't think I was clear enough, saying: "Part of the trouble with men like this is, they really believe they love the woman, and of course the woman believes them."
Then, trying to make myself clear, I said: "Yep, that's the problem. Where we see a need to possess an object, they see love. It's their calling it love that so confuses women, and maybe it's part of what makes women stay a lot longer than they should. How many times have we heard, But He Loves Me So Much? WE know this isn't love, but the women involved seem to think Love is Love....it's not!"
I think this is all hard to understand even for a native speaker of English like myself. I'm afraid we might have lost chinmayee_s a while back. If so, we're sorry! We didn't mean to confuse you.
My mother said a long time ago, "Just because a man says he loves you doesn't mean it's a good idea to have him in your life."
My point is just that, based on the title of this thread: He THINKS he loves you, he TRULY BELIEVES he loves you, but he does NOT know what love is. Of course you're confused! Heck, I'm confused! It's all nasty and difficult. Just remember what my mother said.
Please check back with us, chinmayee_s, just to let us know you're OK.