Became a mistress ; confused by it all

Here is the deal: I was married; had a couple of kids, my now ex wasn't give me sex for several years. I couldn't leave him because of financial reasons. I turned to a good guy friend of mine and we became FWB, I learned to love sex again as when sex goes; bickering starts and pretty much it isn't a marriage anymore. FWB moves away, I get divorced, I am happy and then I hear from someone who I have known for 30 years. He is in the same situation; but difference is, he has the money to leave , he is conflicted on what he wants and his needs aren't being met; he and wife hasn't had sex in a year. They both work and hardly see each other;

They argue and I know wife is like how I was, doing what she can to save the marriage. We were chatting and talking about the lack of sex and all of a sudden it turned to sexting. We both agreed it was wrong and dropped it, then it started again. While I know it is wrong; I am not getting emotionally involved; but I also get what he is going through, I have told him, he needs to work on the marriage; find out what he wants because both need to be happy either together or divorced.

I know a lot of people who are in these situations don't leave their partners/spouses because of the kids; I will give advice: kids see when parents are not happy. My parents divorced and married other people, I grew up happy. My parents were best friends after the divorce.

The situation is not typical; he isn't someone I met off the street or internet. We knew each other for years. I do care for him and give him advice when he wants it. We haven't done more than sexting and the sexting is every so often. While it is wrong, in most peoples eyes -- mine included, I also understand him, I have been in that situation, I understand. It sucks when you are not connecting with the partner.

Just to let you know, when I was married, I always wanted sex and he kept putting me off; turning me down. He wasn't cheating on me (I checked everything). He lost interest in sex once I had kids.

There are typical cheaters out there who have a great marriage; but there are people who need that emotional support; who want to feel loved and if the other half isn't providing, or turning a blind eye, then that is why some people wander. But it is up to the people to make the decision; am I happier outside the marriage? If so, maybe it is better if we divorce.