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Fri 7 Jan, 2005 03:30 pm
The other day, I was pondering one of my favorite life topics: sex, and sex with those I dig...eh, those people with vaginas...eh, Women, that's right.
Then I thought of the times I have heard from a woman's mouth I haven't slept with, "I'm not going to sleep with you."
Then I thought of how many of those women I never slept with, and the answer was, NONE. Most were about 1/2 hour after those words came out.
This made me giggle like a fat kid who just found a piece of fudge.
Women: why have you used this line, only to be clearly lying to yourself and the guy? I'm pretty sure I know exactly why women say this, I'm just curious to see what your answers are.
I'm not going to sleep with you, Slappy.
<ok, so what happens next?>
<setting up camera and flood lights>
ehBeth wrote:I'm not going to sleep with you, Slappy.
<ok, so what happens next?>
What usually happens next, is I hear my all time favorite sentence whispered in my ear...
"do you have a condom?"
<whips out condom and hands to ehbeth>
<waiting to roll camera.....>
I've got condoms. No sensible woman leaves home without a couple.
Now what?
Hey, all they said was they wouldn't "sleep" with you. That has nothing to do with having sex with you. Wham, bam, toss 'em some cab fare, everyone gets home happy.
Forget cab fare. Make sure she can get a good parking spot near your place.
<elbows cav to either get out of the way or adjust the lighting....slappy's ass appears too white...>
I am not a very good thread hijacker.
But I do want Slappy naked on film.
ehBeth wrote:Forget cab fare. Make sure she can get a good parking spot near your place.
Cabs be cheaper than parking these days.
Let's let him finish that pint of Ben and Jerry's before you start oiling him up, Kristie.
:wink:
Hey! Just what I thought.
No answers, because you women don't even know why. I don't think "logic" exists in your brains.
Let's just turn this into another "how long can you make my thread-chain game-what are you wearing" thread.
Ok...you got 5 minutes buddy.
Then into the kiddy pool......we got a vat of baby oil with your name on it.
But hey, fair deal in life.
You women keep thinking like this, and sexy-time will be o'plenty.
Kristie wrote:Ok...you got 5 minutes buddy.
Then into the kiddy pool......we got a vat of baby oil with your name on it.
All you had to do is ask, Kristie.
You had me at "hello."
Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:Hey! Just what I thought.
No answers, because you women don't even know why. I don't think "logic" exists in your brains.
Let's just turn this into another "how long can you make my thread-chain game-what are you wearing" thread.
Women say it to test you. They want to see if you'll hang around if you don't think you have a chance at the punani.....ok, noreally we do it because we women are suppose to be all virgin like, and saying that creates the illusion of non-slut status. But really we're just as sex starved as you guys. And deep down you know it. And like it. :wink:
My favorite answer to that statement, "who said I was going to let you sleep with me?"
Kristie wrote:Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:Hey! Just what I thought.
No answers, because you women don't even know why. I don't think "logic" exists in your brains.
Let's just turn this into another "how long can you make my thread-chain game-what are you wearing" thread.
Women say it to test you. They want to see if you'll hang around if you don't think you have a chance at the punani.....ok, noreally we do it because we women are suppose to be all virgin like, and saying that creates the illusion of non-slut status. But really we're just as sex starved as you guys. And deep down you know it. And like it. :wink:
That is so funny because i was about to say that the one time I remember a girl saying those exact same words, We slept together that same day. Then later she told me that it was a test to see if I stuck around after she said that.
Note to ladies: Tests are way unsexy. However, if yer gonna give us sex anyway, we'll put up with it, for a while.
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