I cheated and I don't know what to do

Forums: Cheating, Boyfriend
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Thank you to anyone who will answer.
I've been with my current boyfriend for a little over a year. We have and always have had a long distance relationship since I study in a city 4 hours from home. The first time I cheated (I know I suck) was only after 6 months and I cried in his arms because I missed my boyfriend who I hadn't seen in several months. And the second time was last weekend. Both times with a friend (different people).
I don't want to justify my actions, I just want to be honest, I did it because of the long distance. I get very lonely, I feel the need for affection and I look for it in the wrong place, and since both times it was with a friend it felt like I was getting the affection from my boyfriend.
I love him dearly, so very much, and I absolutely do not want to lose him. I don't think I want to tell him, because it would just hurt him for no reason and I don't think we'd ever recover (especially because it happened twice). I need your help, whoever will read.
Thank you.

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@Aliona,

It seems that you're not in a good place, emotionally, to be in a long distance relationship.

Break it off. Just let him know that the long distance thing isn't working for you. Your cheating doesn't have to be discussed. Not now. Not in the future.

Perhaps when you're both in the same city sometime in the future and if you're both still available you can try dating again. You need someone who is more available to you than someone who lives four hours away.

It's just the way it is. Some people/couples can make long distance work. Others can't. It doesn't make you a bad person unless you try to continue the relationship while cheating - that's not fair to the other person unless the relationship was open in advance (which is my preference).

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@Aliona,

What kind of "cheating"?

You went out? Hugges? Kissed? Sex?

I'm not an advocate of LD relationships for young people. People are just too energetic, vibrant, at their social and emotional highs, and are prone to be sexually explorational.

Most likely your guy is in the same boat as you.

Agree to date others while you are away from each other. If you are meant to be more than that, time will allow you to come together.

You are not ready to be exclusive to an absent partner. Admit that to him.

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@Aliona,

Go back home, tell him, pray he will understand and stay. The only chance for this to actually continue as you wish.
Otherwise just break up, live whereever you want and sooner or later you will find someone else. Life moves on, no pressure, dear

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I cheated and I don't know what to do

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