Wed 2 Aug, 2017 11:33 am
first of all, english isn't my native language and second, i'm a girl. so. there's this one girl (let's call her A.) i've been writing with for 2 years. and somehow it was always an on-off thing between us. however, recently she started to send me mixed signals even though she's in a relationship with another girl. we have some kind of sexual attraction to each other (no, i'm not imagining this because when she told me i'm cute, i asked her in a flirty and jokingly way if i'd be cute enough to seduce her and she answered with yes *coughs* i blushed because well i have feelings for this girl and actually i didn't expect a yes there because she always used to change the topic and stuff when i said things like that. well. when i asked her if she meant what she just said, she made clear she was being honest. it ended up with me changing the topic by the way because i was basically shocked lol). so like... we flirt a lot. she's probably just a flirty person in general though so i don't have high hopes. but well. today she told me her girlfriend suspects her of cheating now cuz she readed one text in which i said something and called A. beautiful. at this point both me and A think she's the type of girlfriend once she gets suspicous of being cheated on, she'd definitely check A.'s phone and look for messages when she's not around.
i do feel guilty now even though we were 'only' flirting. and both of us don't know what to do. i told her to delete our former conversations, but for some reason A. didn't want to. i'm just afraid that if A.'s girlfriend really checks her phone, she'll be hurt or even worse, break up with A. and while it's true that i have feelings for A., i certainly don't want to be the reason for a shattered relationship. so. should i try to convince her to delete the chat?
It's only flirting.
Unless you were actively looking to meet and do all that implies, you're fine.
Are you and A planning to meet?
Yeah, around november and that's the thing. i'm totally torn. on one side i'm convinced i'd never do anything as long as she has a partner, because i know myself, but on the other side i have absolutely no idea what will happen when we meet. i'm afraid my feelings will overcome me.
Yeah I think that A has cheated, if she's with someone else she shouldn't have even entertained the idea of flirting with you.
A's girlfriend deserves to know the full extent of what's going on between you two and that you've both implied getting with the other.
It's cheating as soon as you start thinking about being with someone else & actually acting upon it.
If you feel guilty then it mostly cheating
saying she was beautiful was not cheating by any means. her responding yes to her being susceptible to you seducing her was definitely cheating on her significant other by inviting you to be romantic with her.
i suggest you both clean up your conversations to be platonic in nature for a while till her butch calms down about her submissive flirting with you. i am sure her butch is only mad at her for opening the door to an affair with you.
you can bet your meeting in the future will never be allowed.