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Thu 20 Jul, 2017 08:50 am
A few years back there was this girl that confessed her love to me. I didn't really like her the same so I told her, in hopes to lessen the hurt and not lead her on. However, even after I told her this she would still talk to me and told me that she will always love me. We have similar interests and she is really nice. Since then she has been in a couple relationships and I haven't been in any. I'm actually very shy and a bit anti-social, so when it comes to talking to persons in general it is hard unless the conversation is something I have interest in. I recently saw her online and scrolled through our past conversations and I was thinking of talking to her but I didn't. I feel as if I want to talk to her and get to know her better but I guess I'm just not really sure if I should. Is it bad for me to try and accept her love after all this time? I don't know if she still likes me.
@Osopher,
Have you ever met in person?
Why do you think you can sustain and nurture an online relationship?
@Osopher,
Osopher wrote: I don't know if she still likes me.
when did you last spend time with her - in person?
@PUNKEY,
Yes we went to high school together.
@ehBeth,
We actually went to high school together graduated in 2016.
@Osopher,
When did you last spend time together with her - in person?
(your response didn't answer my question)
@Osopher,
How are you ever going to figure all this out unless you soend REAL time together- face to face.
@Osopher,
"Is it bad for me to try and accept her love after all this time? I don't know if she still likes me.".
If you dont even know if she likes you then you dont know that she loves you so basically you currently have nothing but a
Wet Dream Girl.
You might work on that.
@ehBeth,
Well when we were in high school we had some of the same classes but we were sort of in different social groups so we seldom spent time with each other except in one class where I was seated next to her. It was in this class that I discovered some of our similarities and like interests. I think what she felt for me was maybe more of a "love at first sight" kind of thing.
@PUNKEY,
That's what I'm trying to figure out. I want to ask her if she is still interested and if so maybe it could lead to us spending real time together to learn more about one another. I'm just not sure if it is a wise choice because it's been about a year since I've seen her and I feel a little bad for not giving her a chance back then because she really is nice. I just didn't care for a relationship back then because I just didn't want one. With anyone- and I didn't have one.
@Osopher,
Start low.
If you live in the same city, call her. Call her and ask her if she'd like to get together for a coffee/tea/soda on a weekend afternoon. Go to a park, go for a walk. Chat with her. Don't talk about liking/loving/relationships. Just casual chat.
@ehBeth,
Thanks that's great advice. It's much better to ease into things rather than going all out I suppose.
@Osopher,
If you don't talk to her, are you always going to wonder "What if I did?"
It's just conversation. You're not asking her to marry you.
Plus, by doing something you're leery/afraid of, you increase your confidence.
@Osopher,
Osopher wrote:It's much better to ease into things rather than going all out I suppose.
yup - and much easier on the other person. going all out when you have not been in touch (in person) for a while can be a bit freaky