This probably belongs on a different thread, but I just this e-mail yesterday and -- speaking of words and their daffy-nitions -- thought I'd share it with you here.
Alternative meanings, from The Washington Post
1. Coffee (n), a person who is coughed upon.
2. Flabbergasted (adj), appalled over how much weight you have
gained.
3. Abdicate (v), to give up hope of ever having a flat
stomach.
4. Esplanade (v), to attempt an explanation when drunk..
5. Willy-nilly (adj), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj), describes a condition in which you
absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.
7. Lymph (v), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n), an olive flavoured mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n), the emergency vehicle that picks you up
after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n), a humorous question in an exam.
12. Rectitude (n), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a
proctologist immediately before he examines you.
13. Oyster (n), a person who sprinkles his conversation with
Yiddish expressions.
14. Circumvent (n), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n), the belief that, when you die, your
soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Pokemon (n), a Jamaican proctologist.
BTW, by definition - this is the right thread for any and everything!
Dear Auntie Bunny-Wabbit, why is everyone here so silly, when i'm trying to be very, very, VERY serious?
Buggered if I know, Setanta - great definitions, MA.
NOBODY can love in a mini - except, perhaps, little people.
however, mini's improve access.
hmmm. i thought microsoft improved access.
(well, i unnerstand that they actually don't improve anything, but that kills the joke. in fact, this way, you can either laugh at the feigned misapprehension or at the notion of those bastards making anything better. or not. i admit it were pretty week, but i don't have the sense to keep my yapper shut.)
Just to digress, my favorite oxymoron these days is Microsoft Works.
AT seventeen, I got a teeny little Triumph Spitfire (my twin brother got an MG Midget - same car, slightly different grille). Very teeny two seater english sports cars for boys with big dreams and teeny money. But...love can be committed anywhere.
Still want one of them beauties. For some reason, I wanted the Triumph. I probably would have been dead by now if I had of had one though.
I was madly in love with an MG-TD, the earliest model sold in North America, only the MG-TC was older. There was a beauty of an MG-TD which i used to see when in was in University in 1968-69, owned by a very pretty and pleasant young lady, who used to wash it every Saturday. I now suspect that she knew she would attract attention from the guys, and she was trying to sell it, as well. She wanted $1200, a fortune in those days, when i worked for $1.35/hour in gross pay, and lived, if not well, at least comfortably on that amount. I was so taken with it, i hardly noticed the girl at all. My girlfried was at first jealous, until we were walking down that street on Saturday, and she saw me mooning over the car, and realized the girl was no competition. She thought it was all very funny, until she decided she would have to compete for my attention in the presence of the car. She and i did not walk down that street any longer.
A sad english sports car story if ever I heard one.
We have an English car meet here every year in one of the cities multi-acre outdoor gardens. TDs and TCs (immaculate restorations) are there, along with Lotuses and Jags and Rolls and Morgans etc...
The Sprite was actually a poor second choice. I'd come into Vancouver with a pocketful of money to buy a TD! Found one, but the fenders had been 'customised', and my brother (a true car freak) wouldn't let me buy as a matter of integrity and principle. The ****. So we drove home in the sprite. But it FUN and it got me laid.
MGs! Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......
I would squish for an MG!
yr posts contains a 6 letter word
Tsk Tsk - if you don't repent, you will burn in hell !!!
Retract your superstructure with much vim and vigour!
the ultimate (in my feable mind) was the, albeit rare, twin cam all syncro MGA followed closely by the Austin 100 then the Austin Healey 3000. the more esoteric list would have the Lotus 7 and Elan as leaders.
Lord have mercy - it's a car thread!
