When i was a boy, we din't have no vacuum cleaners, we had to get down on our hands and knees with a brush . . . then if we wanted ice cream after, we had to crank the handle 'til it felt as though our arms would fall off . . .
I'm not the father to my g/f's 3 boys and when I bitched about the 18 year old leving his dirty dishes for us to clean up I got a f**k you from Mom.
Two days of glacial silence and I'm still grieving.
panzade wrote:I'm not the father to my g/f's 3 boys and when I bitched about the 18 year old leving his dirty dishes for us to clean up I got a f**k you from Mom.
Two days of glacial silence and I'm still grieving.
there will come a time when they need a ride somewhere or need assistance from you. That's when you remind them of that and tell them to f*#k off....or at least leverage yourself a blow job........ :wink:(from mom of course
)
Bear, it might work but for the fact that they've become expert manipulators of Mom. Bless her heart, she just can't say no. They long ago gave up on asking me for anything.
panzade wrote:Bear, it might work but for the fact that they've become expert manipulators of Mom. Bless her heart, she just can't say no. They long ago gave up on asking me for anything.
well is the glass half empty or half full....if she can't say no..... :wink:
It's just half...sex is wonderful...when the critters don't pit us against each other. We had to throw the 20 year old out and change the locks. Perhaps that's what's causing the anxiety.
I come from a loving family and me aside, an educated and professional family...but we have a rule and it goes "We love you , but if you're going to be an ass wipe then get the hell out and don't come around 'til you straighten up". It works for us.
No regrets, no angst.
I can understand why you were upset with me over at the "fly erection" thread, panzade.
I wasn't aware of the difficulties you were having at home.
Good luck and all that.
I hear you dude. I come from the same environment. This is a whole different ball game. Turning around years of chaos is a painstaking job.
Pan, in my opinion (and extensive experience with dishes) I'd say that is where you stop doing them. If she doesn't care if they leave dirty dishes, she can be the one to clean them. If there are no clean dishes for the next meal, someone besides you will need to wash them before they can eat. Buy a pack of paper plates for yourself. You probably won't need them for more than a week.
Maybe she was just having a bad day, Panzade.
Try it again on one of her good days.
Ahhh. Wise counsel. However, there are complications: Mama suffered a heart attack...yes at the age of 46 no doubt with the pressures of home and work. She will be the one to clean the dishes and to do their laundry and wash their towels ...and it goes on and on. That's why I was in the habit of doing the dishes and cooking most every night. So if I play passive and stay out of the kitchen it all reverts back to pre- heart attack.
Why not confront the boys outside the home and threaten to beat the **** out of them...they sound like grown men.....then tell them if they tell mommy you'll throw them off a f*#king bridge...then to prove you mean it and you're crazy take a razor and slice your chest open and grab them and rub their face in it and.........oh wait......never mind...got into a weird area there......
Sigh...already been there. And I touched the twenty year old...in anger. That was a big no-no.
Apparently the father used to beat them and I jst brought back some bad karma...it's a tough situation...but I am open to suggestions...I don't have the experience to sort this out myself.
sounds to me like this woman comes with some heavy baggage Pan...you must really love her......I didn't mean to make light of it.. .....I don't mean to sound shitty but have you really sat back and thought about whether your relationship with her is worth all this?
Yes Bear...I really have. And she is worth it to me.
We met on line and IM'd back and forth for a year before we dated. For another year the baggage was
too much and I demured. Then I fell in love and the baggage from both of us fills up the foyer. She has it tough because I can leave at any time but she can't. That's why I have to find a way to deal with it. She's worth every suitcase and hand bag.
Well then you'll have to tough it out I guess...keep the twenty year old out....that's one down.....and if the mom sees that the world doesn't come to an end it may make it easier for her to cut the ties with the others if they follow in his footsteps.....I guarantee you that somewhere she longs to be free of the day to day of these kids once she's done the job of raising them....that's not cold that's just how it is....eventually the cubs are supposed to leave the den and make their own life
Pan, I'm not an expert, but I think I'd call her on the f**k you. Tell her that you are bending over backwards to take care of her and her ingrates and it hurts you to be so disrespected. Then I'd definitely suggest counseling. For all of you. Or you could call Dr. Phil. It sounds like they are all a bit damaged and probably don't know how to fix it. And believe me, I know what damaged looks like.
panzade wrote:Sigh...already been there. And I touched the twenty year old...in anger. That was a big no-no.
Apparently the father used to beat them and I jst brought back some bad karma...it's a tough situation...but I am open to suggestions...I don't have the experience to sort this out myself.
How about counciling, then you don't look like the bad guy when it comes to making sugestions it won't be them against just you.
Living with someone elses children is difficult. It's difficult if their your own.