Who can get the drunken kickycan closest to his house?

You know Paula, I'm just not a witty repartee kinda guy. But I try...I really do.

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Pan, you can be anything you want to be.

Well I'm off to go apple picking, but I will be back.

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panzade wrote:

kickycan wrote:
Hey! That is pretty close to what happened to me tonight, Gus.

I went out with a couple friends, and we ended up doing tequila shots at the "Pig n' Whistle" on 55th and 3rd...yadda yadda yada, they get in a taxi to Queens, and I'm walking around blitzed, alone, and happy at 59th and Lexington at 3:00 in the morning.

So I'm stumbling along, happy and smashed as a clam, when some cute young french tourist asks me how to get to the uptown subway. So I ask her to hold on a second, because I'm drunk. She smiles nervously and decides that I'm harmless, as I look around to get my bearings.

I look up, and there's the red-orange neon sign out front of the old friendly "Subway Inn" at 60th and Lex. A monument to dive bars everywhere. It could be the coolest dive bar on the planet...

"Mister, wake up...Mister!"

It's the cute french girl, shaking me awake. I've passed out and fallen into a heap on the street again. Damn those stupid friends of mine for getting me drunk! Again!

But what a cute face. I wonder if she might possibly speak Italian.

I walk with her to the Subway Inn, to the corner where her uptown train is. I compliment her on her english. She smiles again, and tells me how much she is enjoying seeing New York.

I think about asking her if she'd like to get a drink with me at the Subway Inn, but I don't. I point her to the entrance to the subway. She thanks me, smiling, and is gone.

I get lost on the way home, twice, although I have been this way many times before. But it's not my fault. The image of a cute french tourist is dancing in front of my eyes, making it hard to see.

That's some nice writing Kicky.

Thanks. I get lucky sometimes. :wink:

paulaj wrote:

That french girl was me!

To bad you were to drunk we could have had a good time :-)

And just for the record I don't speak Italian.

In that case...

Posso baciare i tuoi petti? Lascerestimi a massaggiare le tue ferme, grassocce natiche stasera? La mia salsiccia e grande a grosso. Anche, ha sapore del bianco cioccolato.

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Chuckling....

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All right Kicky, what's it all about. Is it something nice? Something pertaining to...........my lightning fast wit, my good looks, how chaming I can be? All of the above?

I have to leave again. Buh-by

Would someone decode while I am away. Thanks in advance.

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Basically Paula, his sausage is expanding and it's pretty gross....just to paraphrase.
BTW what kinda apples did you bring me?

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Posso baciare i tuoi petti? Lascerestimi a massaggiare le tue ferme, grassocce natiche stasera? La mia salsiccia e grande a grosso. Anche, ha sapore del bianco cioccolato.

Can I kiss your breasts? Would you let me massage your firm plump buttocks tonight? My sausage is large and fat. Also, you taste of white chocolate.

I think that's a pretty close translation.

Our Kicky is doing so well in italiano!!

edit, grosso = well-built or thick or important

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Very nice Osso. And kudos Kicky. I admire your wanting to learn another language...it's so...so...un-american.
Being fluent in Spanish I can discern most Italian phrases...in my own way.

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Actually, Osso, at the end there, I was trying to say "Also, it (my sausage) tastes like white chocolate."

You got most of it though, so I guess I'm getting better.

Panzade, my best friend is Argentinian and he and his wife speak spanish. They say the same thing. They can decipher a lot of it. It's cool speaking to them in Italian and having them actually understand it. I can't wait until I can have real conversations.

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kickycan wrote:

Actually, Osso, at the end there, I was trying to say "Also, it (my sausage) tastes like white chocolate."

Kicky, I thought we already discussed "white chocolate". I'll repeat myself one more time-

White chocolate is nice, but dark chocolate is better, .............why? because it melts in your mouth not in your hand. :-)

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Oh, of course. You're right. I was thinking of "you" formally, and surely that is inappropriate...

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panzade wrote:

Basically Paula, his sausage is expanding and it's pretty gross....just to paraphrase.
BTW what kinda apples did you bring me?

No apples Pan, the kids I brought switched gears, instead we did a hayride, toured a nice farm, and then off to a small fair, over to a playground (3 towns away) and last but not least an ice cream for the way home.

It was nice to come home and find someone wants to kiss my breasts, massage my buttocks, and (correct me if I am wrong) explode their sausage...something or other....white chocolate scenario.

Nice.

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Damn Kicky. This Paula has turned into a hotty!

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I was a skeptic...you're improving a ton. Proud of ya chicken-hawk

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A HOTTY? Good heavens. <walks off mumbling>

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There are worse things querida.

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panzade wrote:

querida.

What is that?

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querida is a small chicken hawk found in the Southwest region of the United States. It feeds mostly on lizards and occasionally will eat a taco.

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Hmmm...Gus has a jealous streak a mile wide.

OK Gus,I won't flirt with Paula anymore.

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Be careful with your words, panzade.

Paula is kicky's bitch.

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Who can get the drunken kickycan closest to his house?

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