cavfancier wrote:kickycan wrote:Anyone ever have one of those farts that you let out, thinking it's going to be just a regular run of the mill fart, and then realize that you've actually sh*t yourself a little bit? That is not fun. Especially in a public swimming pool.
That's when the lifeguard has to beep the whistle and yell out "We've got a floater!"
Thanks. Best laugh I've had all day.
Ahh, now we know who was really responsible for Chernobyl.
Excuse me, I think I made a wrong turn somewhere. Could someone direct me to the **** thread?
kickycan wrote:Excuse me, I think I made a wrong turn somewhere. Could someone direct me to the **** thread?
I wouldn't touch a straight line like that with a ten-foot pole.
I know this question really belongs in 'Music and Lyrics', but is anyone here into scat? I LOVE Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald. They were both geniuses. Their scat rose far above the average "doodie doodie doo" that pretender Sinatra put out.
John is in Amsterdam and visits a nudist colony there.
While wandering around naked he sopts a gorgeous blonde and he immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over and says "Sir, did you call for me?"
John replies: "No!"
She says "Well, it's a rule here that if I give you an erection, it means you called for me."
She then layes him down and starts making love to him.
Later that day John visits the sauna, but as he sits down he farts. A huge big hairy guy get up, drops his towel to show a huge erection and says "Sir, did you call for me?"
John replies, "No!"
The man says, "It's a rule that when you fart, it implies you called for me." The man then knocks John to the floor and has his way with him.
As soon as he's finished John rushes back to his room, grabs all his things and heads for the exit. On his way out he's stopped by the manager he askes "Can I help you ?"
John says "Here's my room keys I'm leaving early"
The manager asks why and John replies "I'm 60 years old, I get an erection once a week but I fart 20 times a day !!"
OK, I have to repost this.. cuz i can mostly. AND this is an appropriate thread
Fart + 69 = EMBARASSING...
anyone ?
:: raising hand ::
Are we talking just one fart, or sixty-nine?
HAHAH!
just one.. liiiiitle bitty one... >squeek<
I can fart so hard I will break a wooden chair. ;-)
Does ass size effect fart sound?
shewolfnm wrote:Does ass size effect fart sound?
I don't think so.
True story, I was on a four-bean chili kick for a while, and Mrs. cav was trying to listen to the radio late at night, while I snored and tooted, apparently so loud it drowned out the broadcast. It smelled horrible too. <sniff> It was one of my...proudest moments.
shewolfnm wrote:Does ass size effect fart sound?
i should know this isnt true because I have an 8month old whos farts I can hear through her diaper and in my bedroom.
> sniff sniff < I am ..........soo......... proud.
