My Mother's Cat

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I thank you all in advance for your patience and interest.
My mother is elderly and lives alone. My sister and I are her only children, we are both middle aged and live separately with our own families. My sister lives near my mother and so visits several times a week, I live further away and only visit once or twice a month.
My mother owns a cat, which she has had for many years. The cat lived in the house, but was occasionally let outside for short periods of time. Lately my mother has been leaving the cat out for longer periods of time. Sometimes it's out for a few hours, sometimes for a day, sometimes for several days. My mother feeds the cat regularly when it's out. The cat has many places to get out of the weather and seems to enjoy being outside.
My sister is very sensitive to the plight of abused animals, she cries when she sees the ads of the abused dogs on TV, and she donates to the animal shelter. When she found out that my mother was leaving the cat outside for long periods, she became VERY upset and angry and demanded that my mother stop doing this. Now I've only rarely seen my sister this upset over anything before, and she's never demanded anything from my mother before.
She says that it's cruel to leave the cat outside because it'll be cold and wet and scared and in danger from dogs and fleas and ticks etc.
I've tried to explain to her that the cat is capable of taking care of itself, still has a steady supply of food and has shelter (not to mention fur), and seems to be healthy and happy. She will not hear it.
I guess I have two questions: Why is my sister overreacting like this? How can I convince her that the cat is fine outside?

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Type: Question • Score: 6 • Views: 2,140 • Replies: 40

@TomTomBinks,

Well, I don't think anyone will convince you of the fact the cat isn't really fine outside, and that your sister has some very valid points.

You're convinced she's over reacting, and that you have the correct answer.

So, I guess we've got a conundrum on our hands.

Does anyone give the cat monthly flea drops to prevent flea infestation?
Has it received vacinations and booster shots for feline leukemia?

I think you may best be served by googling something like Are cats better indoor or outdoors.

Not like that will make any difference to you.

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@chai2,

If cats did not like being outside I would like to know why I have cats from all around in my garden day and night. All are well fed, well taken care of and have a family. They also regularly visit a vetrenarian.
I do not feed them. I think that is up to the owners - otherwise they might
start living here.
The cats further down the street are outside a lot too. Some nights if they have a little door to get in and out and others only during the day.

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@TomTomBinks,

Our cats were indoor outdoor cats, so I'm sympathetic on your mother's side.
But, I can understand others' views on the matter.

How about all of you talking with the veterinarian? I can see problems with that too, of course.
Is you mother in relatively stable mental health? Assuming so, it is not your sister's business.

1 Reply

I've owned cats previously. Your sister is right in that indoor cats on average live much longer lives. Cats are in danger in the sense of getting hit by cars, other animals, and so forth. I always had indoor cats.

However, your sister is carrying this a bit too far. It is not abusive to have an outdoor cat. As long as the cat is being cared for - has the appropriate vaccinations, feed is allowed shelter, is healthy and so forth.

It is a difference of opinion of which is better for the animal and therefore if your mom is of good mind then it is really up to her on how she feels is the correct care of the cat.

But from the sounds of it you are unlikely to change your sister's mind.

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@Linkat,

Let me mentione the age of the cats around here that I know - all indoor and outdoor
14 (dead) 16 (Died Saturday) around 13 to 14 - 19 - 12- 4 - 15 (dead)
I think these agegroups show that outdoor cats can reach a certain age as long as they do not get run over.

1 Reply

In the U.S., depending on where you are living, cats can be a snack for coyotes. I'm from the Los Angeles area and there are some there, mostly at the outskirts, more rural areas, and some coming down from rural areas to town once in a while; far as I know, never one in my longtime area of the city.

I've read they've showed up in New York City, but I'm guessing that is relatively rare, and cats likely to be inside because of the city's architectural development.

http://www.humanesociety.org/animals/coyotes/tips/coyotes_pets.html

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@chai2,

Thank you for your input. The cat goes to the vet regularly, and has a flea collar. I'm not sure about the vaccinations. Another member stated that since this is my mother's cat this is my mother's decision. I can only give my opinion. Maybe you could enlighten as to why someone would react so strongly on this subject. I won't be able to change either my mother's or my sister's behavior or either of their minds, I only want to understand.

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Does the cat have a little hut in a safe place to go to at night?

WHY is this in-door cat NOW being let out for hours, days, nights?

Is it doing its business inside? Is it sick? Or is your mother getting forgetful?

Tell your sister if she is so upset, SHE can come and get the cat.

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@ossobuco,

My mother is still "with it" and is not being cruel to the cat. When the weather is harsh she doesn't let it outside. You're right it's not my sister's business, but she has promised to not visit or help my mother with things if my mother continues letting the cat out. ??!! I live too far away to get my mother to her appointments and to help her when she needs it.

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@PUNKEY,

The cat has either under the deck out back or into the garage to get out of the weather. My father mostly took care of this cat and only let it outside when he would sit on the deck. He died two years ago, and my mother thinks the cat should be out more. Sometimes the cat will poop in places other than the litter box. My mother's eyesight isn't so good, so she can't always find the poop. She's not forgetting about the cat, she just thinks it should be an indoor/outdoor cat.

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@saab,

They can of course, but on average (why I said on average) indoor cats live longer than outdoor - doesn't mean you can have cats that live until 20 that are outdoor cats and one that lives 1 month that is indoors.

There are more dangers outdoors - viruses, bacteria, cars, coyotes, foxes, dogs and other cats --- not to mention a sick human or two. Unless my cats vet was incorrect. Vets do recommend keeping cats as indoor pets. I am not against having an outdoor cat - it is strictly the fact that outdoor cats have a lower life expectancy.

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@TomTomBinks,

Look at what community resources are available for your mom - seniors transport for appointments etc. Depending on her location, jurisdiction and situation, there may be some good options available.

It's not good to only rely on one person (relative or otherwise) to provide assistance. Things get messy too easily.

1 Reply

@TomTomBinks,

To be honest I don't know why your sister would react in such a way. Personally I think it is beyond reason. so I couldn't enlighten you.

Is she a PETA person - they all seem crazy to me. I love animals, but would never join an organization like PETA - they carry things way too far.

1 Reply

@ossobuco,

I just fully read that coyote link; they would be on your sister's side.
Me, I remember our cats loving going outside, and they didn't roam.

I know feral and maybe other cats do.

Somewhere here there is a thread about this subject (well, probably several). I remember posting an article that showed how you can have a cat track outdoors, so it can spend time under or near the trees without being prey, or, the alternative, predators. I picture the set up in that article as attached to the house fairly high up - which didn't appeal at all to me, but the idea was interesting.

Maybe there is some possible adjustment by both women - build an area into a chain link and topped enclosure (maybe topped with a wire mesh over 2 x 4s) with some nice things in it like a little hut with cushions, water availability, food dishes?, toys? perhaps grow some catnip plants and/or catmint; perhaps the whole thing by a pretty tree. I have no idea if that would work, as we never considered doing that, and, to me, your mother shouldn't have to. I bring it up relative to possible peace keeping.

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

Strongly agree with this.

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@Linkat,

I would not have an out door cat in a city, but otherwise I know mostly in/out door cats. To keep cats only indoors as Vets recommend I would even say is cruelty.
But it depends on where you live.
Imagen to live a life and never have fresh air....

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@Linkat,

She's got a little crazy in her but she's not quite PETA material yet. I wish I could understand her feelings on this subject. When I ask why she reacts so strongly, she just goes on about how scared and lonely the cat must feel while outside. She imagines it shivering and miserable and wanting the comfort and love of it's human.

1 Reply

@ossobuco,

The neighborhood where my mother lives is pretty cat- friendly. Dogs aren't running loose, no coyotes or foxes. It's residential so not much traffic and when there are cars they go pretty slow. Plenty of hunting opportunities for the cat-about-town. The enclosure is a good idea. I don't know if it would satisfy my sister or if my mother would want such a contraption in her yard, but I will suggest it. I'm pretty handy so could put something like that up in no time!

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@TomTomBinks,

All of my cats have been indoor/outdoor, and this is in a small town. They might live longer as prisoners, but I'll tell you something; a cat that wants out is a difficult cat to live with.

1 Reply

My Mother's Cat

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