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I dont know if i should go out with my ex

 
 
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 01:40 pm
I met my ex 2 years ago and our relationship has been on and off since then, until I broke up with him for good a year ago. I cut things off and ive tried to leave him many times before because he always got so clingy very fast. He messaged me on facebook recently, asking how im doing and begging me for another chance to talk. I gave him my number and hes been messaging me every day since then, for 2 months since he contacted me on facebook, we have been talking about very personal stuff, the issues ive been having with my family, and problems hes been having He asked me out for coffee many times and I said no. Just to talk about things. He says he wants to at least be friends, or "more". I rejected the coffee dates. Then, out of the blue, he started asked me to come over to his place and he does this every day now. He keeps talking sexual and trying to come pick me up and get me to come over and stuff. He says "I know you cant live without s**, so choose me instead of some other random guy, I want to be the one". I have been considering possibly meeting him up for coffee since he is so persistent, and I do miss him im not going to lie. But I wonder why he is getting so sexual over the phone now. How do I know if he just wants sex? should I go out with him just for coffee and to talk just to see what his intentions are? or should I forget about him? I do still have feelings for him and I think he does as well (I mean, why would he message me after I broke up with him? when he can find another girl?)
 
roger
 
  3  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 02:00 pm
@sandra19,
I don't know why you gave him your number, and I bet you are wondering, too. My personal feeling is you should get him as far out of your life as possible and as soon as possible. You're going nowhere with this, never will, and he's not doing a thing for your current happiness or peace of mind. It sounds like you feel you owe him some amount of courtesy. In my opinion, you owe him nothing.
0 Replies
 
CeasarSalad
 
  0  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 03:40 pm
@sandra19,
I would recommend making a list of pros and cons regarding this relationship. You have already spoken about several cons including clinginess and sexual exploitation. I know it feels like you need someone to talk to but that's what real friends are for. Regarding why he keeps coming after you-he's horny and his needy overbearing personality is not an attractive characteristic that has made any other girl want to take off her clothes. You should be careful that you don't allow yourself to get sucked back into this relationship which is definitely not in your best interest. It's like feeding a cat-they will never go away.
Beyond that, fornication is wrong. It will never lead to anything positive.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 03:53 pm
@CeasarSalad,
You lost me on the last sentence.
On the other hand, I agree with the rest of your post.
CeasarSalad
 
  0  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 04:08 pm
@ossobuco,
I truly appreciate your response-fornication is a difficult subject to confront. That last sentence was difficult for me to include because I have fornicated in the past, I consider it a sin that I committed from a young age. I believe women should speak up about how fornication does not benefit our gender and even when guilty ourselves, we must still categorize it as a sin that harm many lives both male and female, not to mention the unplanned pregnancies and abortions that result from fornication.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 04:36 pm
@CeasarSalad,
We have differing beliefs. I respect your explaining.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  2  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 04:59 pm
@sandra19,
did you forget why you broke up with him?
0 Replies
 
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 05:09 pm
@sandra19,
Quote:
I met my ex 2 years ago and our relationship has been on and off since then, until I broke up with him for good a year ago.


You had your ex for 1 year in total and within that time, you both were on and off throughout the entire time.

He says " I know you can't go with out sex ,pick me instead of some random guy". What do you think he is actually saying?

"He wants to at least be friends or more". Sex.

"He wants to pick you up and take you to his house, persistent" Sex.

Quote:
But I wonder why he is getting so sexual over the phone now
0 Replies
 
glitterbag
 
  2  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 05:13 pm
@sandra19,
This is a disaster on hold. If you like drama, being controlled and fake love, call him. If you want a healthy happy life cut this clingy user out of your life.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 05:18 pm
@glitterbag,
Bingo!
0 Replies
 
maxdancona
 
  2  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 08:44 pm
@CeasarSalad,
Quote:
Beyond that, fornication is wrong. It will never lead to anything positive.


The statement that fornication is "wrong" is a matter of opinion (I happen to disagree with you).

The statement that fornication never leads to anything positive is factually wrong. Many of us have had wonderful experiences with fornication. That is something positive.

ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 5 Mar, 2016 09:11 pm
@maxdancona,
I agree, as noted earlier.

Some of the best times in my life involved fornicating.

But that does not matter to the poster.. who likely is sincere, re rules.
0 Replies
 
 

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