eoe wrote:I took a 6 year self-imposed break from men also. Well, I took a break. Had no idea it would last for six years. I was lonely without male companionship but during that time, I learned to respect myself and not accept being taken for granted or played for a fool.
Same here. I've come to see myself in a whole new light. I spent so many years thinking about others that I completely lost myself, but now that my son is one year away from being an adult and I've had more time to think of myself, I'm enjoying that me time that I so desperately needed :-D
I dated a lot before marrying at age 28. I wish I had dated less and stayed home and read more or went to movies by myself more when I was young.
For more than a decade, my best friend was a man named Harry. One evening, he suggested sex and I refused. Glad I did. We were very close friends.
During that same time, I had another male friend named Frank. We tried sleeping together, once. Stayed friends for a long time.
Ironically, both now live in Colorado.
Maybe it is because I had brothers, but I tend to like men more as brothers.
Would love a man in my life, despite someone on abuzz accusing me of being a dyke (rotflmao! I am very heterosexual, but he (BobKoch) doesn't know that).
Would not want to marry after spending time with a man who signed my name to loans as though he had power-of-attorney.
I am watching far too much television . . . and I don't care if it is PBS and I am learning all sorts of stuff about history and science . . . a little romance and sex would be nice.
Having someone insist that either I cook or we eat at an Asian restaurant would not be nice.
Having someone decide we should stay home when I am restless or that we should see some mass release movie or that we should visit his old fraternity brother or someone he worked with in radio who has become disgustingly slick would not be nice, either.
I just wish I could feel sexual with a man I get along with as well as I got along with either Frank or Harry.
BTW, littlek, you are always welcome, married or not!
http://www.able2know.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=821925#821925
Region Philbis wrote:very glad!
we've been together for almost 16 years, married for over 12.
our parents are good role models -- both sets got married in 1955...
Made me cry. Thank you, you know how I feel about you.
I married my husband after 10 or 11 years. We had lived together for several years when it became apparent he wasn't going to "ask me."
"It changes nothing," He said.
"It changes everything, "I said, "otherwise you'd do it."
No time limitsÂ…no ultimatumsÂ…I eventually just moved out. "Goodbye darling (kisses both cheeks)." It was an amenable parting, but very sad, for me (wipes tears from eyes).
He proposed several weeks later.
I knew him well enough to know that he wouldn't ask unless he was prepared to do it. The actual ceremony seemed rather unimportant, somehow, after that. I know there's some kind of weird psychology going on with that notion, but in any case, it took seven more years before we finally married in our own back yard - at his insistence! Haha. That was now seven years ago.
So was he right?
My first marriage was based on an erection. The marriage lasted a little longer than the erection, but not much.
I was a month away from marrying my 2nd (and current) wife and I called it off becvause I still wanted to date other girls.
After a year of bed hopping it grew old and I needed more. I asked my wife a second time if she would marry me and we've been at it for 28 years. That year break made all of the difference in the world.
I do not regret getting married the 1st time, although it ended in divorce....nice guy, we just were not in love. We were like brother and sister instead of husband and wife. We are still great friends! That lasted six years and we made two fabulous kids. I wish I had met my new husband a lot earlier! We are great friends/parents/partners/lovers. We are 3 years into it and learn something new everyday! BTW, husband #1 has a beautiful new wife who loves our kids as her own. We couldn't have dreamed a better situation for all of us....
Montana wrote:I envy people who are happily married and wish I hadn't made such lousy choices in men.
Oh Montana, you are absolutely wonderful...you don't have to phrase it that way. I wish you'd had better choices of men!
sozobe wrote:My husband and I on the other hand are both very strong personalities; separately, we each tend towards positons of leadership in our own spheres. It is definitely a lot of work to keep things on a partnership level. That's especially true when we have a joint project, as with getting our house together these last couple of weeks. We both tend to stride into a room and say, "OK, here's what's going to happen," and so we both have had to consciously bite our lips, smile, nod, say "that's a good idea," and "I think that would be great, really, but..." It's not what comes naturally. ;-)
You guys sound just like us! When we were renovating our first house, we couldn't resist correcting each other constantly. Ultimately, we decided that I was "in charge" of colors, and he was "in charge" of supplies. He was "in charge" of painting the ceilings and walls, and I was "in charge" of painting the trim. I was "in charge" of aesthetics, and he was "in charge" of mechanics. Etc., etc. We didn't allow each other to make any comments about our areas of responsibility. It was either that or kill each other.
Eva wrote:Montana wrote:I envy people who are happily married and wish I hadn't made such lousy choices in men.
Oh Montana, you are absolutely wonderful...you don't have to phrase it that way. I wish you'd had better choices of men!
There are always better choices in men.
eoe wrote:Eva wrote:Montana wrote:I envy people who are happily married and wish I hadn't made such lousy choices in men.
Oh Montana, you are absolutely wonderful...you don't have to phrase it that way. I wish you'd had better choices of men!
There are always better choices in men.
and women.....for everyone but me of course...... :wink:
I regret getting married
The biggest mistake of my life was getting married. Marriage is a joke. Men are victims of all the hipe that goes around a marriage, starting with the wedding, flowers, invitations, all the money spent on food, drinks, everything. Suddenly, after a couple of years in the marriage, women are not happy, suddenly your not good enough, your lazy, fat, you don't go out enough, you like your friends more than me, and they leave. Women file for 90% of divorces in the USA. First they make us men fall into there diabolic hands, make us change our ways, make us do **** like giving them flowers, romantic dinners, trips, and when they get tired, they leave you, they don't care if you're sick, broke, whatever, they go. I think it's time to go back to the basics. Us men must take control of a women influenced world, forget about spending thousands in wedding planning, or a stupid dinner on feb 14. I say we take any women we want, it's our GOD given right, just because we are males, the dominant species in this planet. Marriage is the biggest lie in the history of mankind.
Well now, shut my mouth! You certainly speak your mind Mr. JoeLA. Thanks for the laughs. Ps...you have not met the right gal. And you obviously haven't met Texan women yet, have you? They're the bomb.
Wow, joeLA. If I'm reading you right, you don't have a positive view of marriage.
I might suggest that you haven't met the right woman, but it seems you don't care much for the sex as a whole either.
