I'm missing my pink shirt. That's all.
I don't have it; I'm wearing all blue today, apart from my shoes. Perhaps Occom and Kicky have it?
My female friend who had been married for 20 years had a husband who was cyber-cheating/fantasizing. Long story short, his slight type written flirtations escalated to lenghtly in depth fantasy scenarios with whom ever he could get to play along. His argument I'm not cheating I don't even know these people (sound crazy)? She literally had her bag's packed, he agreed to go to therapy about this with her. She got her way and he stopped. But it came pretty close for them.
I thought that I was the only one of few who thought that it's cheating !! Wow !! My husband says the it's just entertainment and that it's harmless,...but when you look at the situation,...if a man would rather spend his time, in secret, looking at porn,...then to be with is significant other, hide it from them, in all forms, via the computer, videos, mags, doesn't He already know it's wrong ?
Personally, I would feel threatened by cyber sex, in a serious relationship. It is the next best thing to cheating and I think it could lead to that. If you feel comfortable enough to go into conversation and I am assuming self pleasure, it seems logical that anyone could also take it a step further to what we would normally call cheating.
I think it is up to every couple to make ground rules as to what their expectations of the relationship are. I don't see a clear cut answer to the question of cyber sex as cheating or not. I can only speak for myself and say I would not find this acceptable.
IMO, cybersex is not cheating. How can it be when no physical act has occured. Cybersex can lead to cheating if the people involved decide to meet and have an affair.
In some instances, cybersex can be harmful to a relationship or marriage. But, in some cases, I think cybersex can add excitement to a couples relationship.
Having cybersex is a personal decison. If you don't feel it's right for you then don't do it. I think it's wrong to criticize people who engage in cyber/phone sex.
I never understood the whole concept of cyber sex.
I dont know If I would consider it cheating in a regular sense, but I do think that it shows little respect for your wife/husband.
Something has to be seriously wrong in a relationship to cause two people to sit at seperate computers and play with themselves.
I will say however that is it just like other things I dont agree with. If it does not affect me in any personal way, I could care less what you do.
BCP1 wrote:
I will say however that is it just like other things I dont agree with. If it does not affect me in any personal way, I could care less what you do.
Don't you mean you "
couldn't
care less?"
I'm glad though, that you don't care. On another board I used to frequent, there are a couple dried up old divorcees that post to every single topic whether they have something constructive to say or not. In fact, one posts every single little detail about her failed love life, even though everyone laughs at her and
no one cares!
If talking or panting about your body online is cheating, then you need not have anymore sex with sheep.
But the sheep seem to enjoy it so much.
I agree with doglover. It ain't cheating unless you have physical sex with somebody. People fantasize all the time; and I'm included in that group. If cybersex is cheating, I've cheated on my wife a thousand times when I looked at naked pictures or told/heard sex jokes or read books with hot and heavy sex involved. You ain't gonna convince me I've cheated.
CI
Cybersex is talking dirty back and forth with another person.
If you're caught cyber cheating is it worth losing what you physically have? I makes no sense. If you're that horny go jerk off.
doglover, I agree. Just wonder what else they consider "unfaithful." LOL
It's funny that all these people say they don't think that cybersex, phone sex, etc... is cheating...I wonder how everyone would feel if they found out their wife/husband was doing it? Perhaps some of them would maintain that it didn't bother them but I'll bet most would be hurt and angry. Could be wrong but...knowing the nature of humans I've a good bet it would be hurt and anger over carefree and nonchalant.
But to each his (or her) own. Everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion
Kristie, It's called "trust." For those that claim that other men or women have not affected their libido must be (brain) dead or lying - maybe both.
I don't deny that other people turn my husbands crank (metaphorically speaking) I guess trust comes into play when 99% of the people cybersexing are doing it behind their spouses back. Is that trust to you? Not me.
If one person says "hey, I like to have fake sex with people online" and the other says "great, me too...let's hope we don't run into each other", then great, fine, wonderful! But too often, and you cannot dispute this, this behavior is done secretly and on the sly. I don't consider that healthy in any respect and while I don't know if I can call this cheating, I definitly don't think that it's right.
