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Life advice

 
 
Reply Sun 19 Jul, 2015 10:31 pm
Greetings from Brazil.
I need some advice regarding a decision
I'm currently in the soccer team at my college, and the thing is, because of the discipline it requires and consequences (like staying there at all the vacation period for practice and everything like skipping classes for practice).
I really want to quit (cause I don't think it's worthy staying there practicing and don't see my parents at the vacation time), but the thing is, I don't have a lot of friends.
Besides my girlfriend I don't have many people to talk to, and if I go to parties or something all the people I talk to are from the soccer team, and if I quit, those people are not going to hang out with me (because here thats how it works, if you quit people will not like you anymore) and etc.
So, I'm kinda scared about quitting because of the possible consequences in my social life.
I would like to hang out with people (not only from my soccer team), but I still don't wanna practice it.
What should I do? Quit it anyway and try to make new friends or meet new people to talk to or not quit and take it to save my social life?
 
jespah
 
  4  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 05:41 am
@crazyjack1995,
Anybody who won't be friends with you because you won't play a sport (what if you destroyed your knee? Playing soccer is a stupid reason for them to be or not be friends with you) is not your friend.

Talk to other people. Make friends who are not situational.
crazyjack1995
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 08:27 am
@jespah,
I know that, but the thing is, everybody that goes to parties or something play sports. And once I quit, I kinda won't be able to hang out with those people.
But I agree with you, I need to change this situation, is just that, it wont be easy (making new friends and etc.).
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 08:32 am
@crazyjack1995,
Aren't there other clubs/groups at the college you could join?
hawkeye10
 
  -1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 08:37 am
@crazyjack1995,
Are you there to party and get laid, or are you there to get an education?
crazyjack1995
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:12 am
@ehBeth,
Kinda.
It's pretty hard to suddenly join a group of people.
That's the problem, there isn't another place to go.
crazyjack1995
 
  2  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:14 am
@hawkeye10,
To get an education it's priority, but the social life it's really important too!
I thought that at college I would meet my best friends and have the greatest time, but apparently not.
chai2
 
  -2  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:18 am
@crazyjack1995,
crazyjack1995 wrote:


I thought that at college I would meet my best friends and have the greatest time, but apparently not.


Apparantly.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:28 am
@crazyjack1995,
Seriously?

If you don't want to meet new people, just say that.

If you want to meet new people, get out and do that.
crazyjack1995
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:45 am
@chai2,
Sorry, it's been a while since I write anything in english.
crazyjack1995
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:46 am
@ehBeth,
I do, and I will.
Everybody gave me good answers, and now my mind is clear.
I will quit the soccer team and see what happens next.
I will try to meet new people I can really have a good time with.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:52 am
@crazyjack1995,
I imagine your college has a listing of all the campus groups.

There are always more than people imagine. I live in a city with several universities and many colleges.

Here is a link to the campus groups for one of the universities

https://ulife.utoronto.ca/organizations

each school will of course have different options ... but there are choices for you.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 09:55 am
@crazyjack1995,
I knew a woman once who wanted to take swimming lessons at her university.

She was in a different country and still had some language limitations in those days. She ended up in a dance group instead - and 10 years later owns a dance school, has married her partner, and is about 3 months from completing her doctorate.

It can all be done Smile
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 10:34 am
@crazyjack1995,
crazyjack1995 wrote:

Sorry, it's been a while since I write anything in english.


Then you missed my message.

I wasn't correcting your word usage.

I was agreeing that you were mistaken if you thought college was going to be some fun filled adventure where you would meet your best friend and have the greatest time.

That's a nice fantasy, but not really the truth.

So quit the soccer team, make friends with other people in your classes, or god forbid, don't have the bestest friend and greatest time for a little while.


0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Jul, 2015 01:29 pm
I still have two fifty year friends from university years. I never joined anything. I was shy to start with and worked a lot of hours and was on endless local transportation for more hours.

How did I get these friends? by chance, I answered when they talked to me at all.

One, I remember distinctly because we were at the same long table in beginning bacteriology class. We all had to bring tin cans in, to keep our needed items for the class. Mine was ordinary. Her's was painted by her. That was a kind of jump for me, that you could do that. We started talking..

Another was in embryology class. I was highly confused there at the beginning, never having looked at sections on slides before. The class was mostly men. A woman asked me to go for coffee at the break. She was an immigrant from Estonia, smart and beautiful. Later on, her then to be first husband used to ride the elevator just to see her. Anyway, we are life long friends.

But I remember many others well too.
People are interesting, other subjects than sports participation are interesting.
I know you know that, just a reminder.
0 Replies
 
Bobby5000
 
  1  
Reply Sat 19 Dec, 2015 02:35 pm
@crazyjack1995,
I'd quit. If its not fun and not worth the tremendous sacrifice college sports now require, don't do it. My son quit his sport, still plays it recreationally and it was a the right thing.
0 Replies
 
 

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