Has my girlfriend cheated?

Forums: Cheating, Relationships
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Hello there, me and my girlfriend have been togethr for over 3 years now and I recently finished my last year at university(where we met) she managed to get a job towards the end of my final year and needed to move somewhere else that was a plane journey away, I thought ok she may be gone a while but we can keep in touch and make it work because we love each other.

So once all the exams and stuff I had were over I started to realise she was being quite distant with me and wanted to talk about what we should do as she was offered a job after this one that would mean she be away for longer and then another job after that one(film industry). I gave suggestions to her for us to make it work such as when I get a graduate job I can come and see her where ever she may be in the world because I will be earning money.

She told me she wanted to end it because it wasn't fair on me that she was not speaking to me as much and she wanted to have some "me time" for her to go off and do what she wants. I understand this but the one thing that keeps popping into my mind is a picture of her in bed with a guy next her in the morning on instagram I had to search for this picture it was on of her friends instagram pages. When I first confronted her she asked me who sent it but I was pretty emotional so couldn't really think straight and decided to talk to her in the morning.
Edit: she had the picture taken off by her friend as well, not sure whether this is significant.

The picture was taken a week into her job and when she explained the situation she said she was in bed with a guy and a girl (both friends and the girl was seeing the guy she was next except she got out of bed and took a picture) the guy she said was next to her has no chest hair but in the picture you can see that there is visible chest hair on the guy next to her thats pretty much the only thing of significance you can see. I have not confronted her about this as I dont want to drive her away and mabye ruin us getting back together later on, I dont know if I am just blinded by my love for her and not seeing the obvious but would love to see what other people think.
I dont really want to post the photo as I dont want it all over the internet.

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Whitewolf, quit howling and move on. It's over.

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@whitewolf14,

whitewolf14 wrote:

...

She told me she wanted to end it ...

Those are the only important words in your post.

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I agree that it is over. It's a hard thing to accept when to you it is not over, but actually easier than lamenting endlessly. The university years are growth years, whether or not one went to school in those years or had other things going on in life, a passage of and through experience. Many of us get such a shock in life, often more than once, almost always hard to go through - but, also often, we might actually be glad later.

Do things for yourself now, maybe in a kind of grieving period, which can take a while, but also as an exploration of things that interest you, people that interest you. In a way, that is what she is doing, stepping out in the world.

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@whitewolf14,

I agree with all of the above. Haul a bit, but then look for someone else.
Your girlfriend clearly told you that she wants out and it seems she has found
someone else already. This would be your clue to beat it !

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@whitewolf14,

Quote:

So once all the exams and stuff I had were over I started to realise she was being quite distant with me and wanted to talk about what we should do

Too late.

You can still keep love alive long distance but from what you have stated, you concentrated on yourself and when that was all over you realised something then was amiss.

Your 'ex' girlfriend has goals, dreams, a new life everything is different her career is starting. She's changed.

It happens and in that and what you stated above, over a short period of time she's realised she's happier on her own.

This didn't come over night whitewolf so consider the past 3 years especially the last 12 months and ascertain whether or not you actually put much effort in or whether you just used the love words and didn't work then, to keep that relationship alive.

We live and learn.

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Has my girlfriend cheated?

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