Its pretty obvious to me..

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I met someone a while a go. We just casually chat. She seems like a nice person if a bit needy. Im just getting over a relationship myself ( posted about it here about a year ago) and her marriage seems to be on the rocks. So when she told me she was married to a immigrant i couldnt help myself but to think he married her for papers. I never said anything and why we discussed some of the short comings of her marriage and my prev relationship we didnt touch the fact that he was a recent immigrant. In fact she only just recently bought it up. We were talking about it yesterday and again i just had to ask. Was he a citizen before you guys got married. She responded no he wasnt. Judging by the way this man acts towards her im pretty sure this is the main reason he wed her ( that and to probably have a roof). One part of me knows to keep my shout and not say anything. However the other part wants to just come out and tell her. Im leaning to keeping my mouth shut.....Thoughts?

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@axpert,

My opinion would be to just let her talk. She obviously feels comfortable talking with you and at the back of your mind, you already know why state something that may hurt her? I am sure she already has those thoughts or the knowledge herself.

Just be her friend. And be there.

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@axpert,

Jeez, judgey much?

Seriously, whatever his reason for marrying her, you don't know him and you barely know her.

This falls rather squarely into areas that are none of your damned business.

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@jespah,

No, i barely know her ummm maybe 3 months now. Judgey maybe a little...

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@axpert,

Not only "judgey" but you also are not up to date with immigration laws.
Nowadays, you only get a "green card" for 2 years. You have to renew it prior to the expiration date and should the marriage not surpass the expiration date of the green card, no new one will be issued.

So, your friend's husband would shoot himself in the foot, if he was out for
immigration papers only.

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@axpert,

axpert wrote:

One part of me knows to keep my shout and not say anything. However the other part wants to just come out and tell her. Im leaning to keeping my mouth shut.....Thoughts?

keep your mouth shut.

I've spent some time re-reading your previous thread about your relationship. You seemed to have some problems picking up social cues a year ago. Given that thread - and just common sense - keep your mouth shut.

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@CalamityJane,

Thanks for the info. I think she said they have been married now for 4 years ( i believe what she told me). I might be a little judgey but to me so far what she has told me leads me to believe thats the reason.

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I'm curious as to what you mean when you say you can tell how he acts with her that he married her for this reason.

How does he act with her?

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I'm curious as to what you mean when you say you can tell how he acts with her that he married her for this reason.

How does he act with her?

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@ehBeth,

I dont have a problem with social cues ehbeth. Right after my thread about the relationship things returned to normal. For a while anyways. Besides ive only actually seen her twice.

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@chai2,

Its more like sequence of events. But they havent slept together since shortly after they were wed. He barely talks to her. They lead totally separate lives. He doesnt pay any bills. Hes never bought her any sorta of gifts. She told me shortly after they met he was pushing for marriage. They were married less than a year after they initially met. Etc etc.

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@axpert,

You've known her for 3 months, seen her twice and she has opened up and told you about her sex life?

Let her sort her own problem out, you don't even know her.

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@FOUND SOUL,

Yes she did at about the 1 month mark.. We both had a similar problem so i know what its like having recently gone through a similar situation. I know people that met people and moved them in two months after they met. So i guess this isnt so bad...lol

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@axpert,

You've seen her twice and she's told this kind of stuff?

Have you ever seen her with her husband? what does he say about this?

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@axpert,

An emotional affair.............................yep...........................

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@ehBeth,

No i have not seen her with her husband. He doesnt know we talk. Yes we both shared our experiences.

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Its pretty obvious to me..

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