The Insult Chain Game

@Mame,

Yes I'm sure you are tired having done nothing all day except eat jelly donuts and press the buttons on the television remote. Maybe tomorrow you'll take the curlers out of your hair, I mean it's been a week now.

I can't recall if I put out the trash and don't feel like checking right now.

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@Mame,

How could you even think about removing the piles of trash from your living room and home?! If you do that you'll remove the main source of food for that raccoon family which lives inside your sofa couch and has been so for 3 years now.

I can't wait until Friday when I plan on seeing The Avengers at the movie theater for the first time.

1 Reply

@tsarstepan,

You mean when you sneak in the back door because you're too cheap to pay.

It's a lovely sunny day here and my niece is coming over with her kiddies.

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@Mame,

So you fooled your niece into thinking you're out of food and money again huh? It's really not proper to charge double the going rate to watch your own kin.

There's a gentle cooling breeze, and the sound of a buzz saw in the distance.

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@Sturgis,

That cooling breeze is from the enormous hole in your roof. Your neighbor, the one who hates you, just cut down a huge tree that landed on your house, dummy. Better take cover, you jerk, he's working on another one.

We'll be having a small celebration on Mother's Day.

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@firefly,

Oh is that the day you've selected to have your mom sign over what little you haven't already stolen, just before you tell her you are shipping her to a state run rest home?

I had a strange desire earlier to eat 16 ounce container of sour cream, so I did.

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@Sturgis,

Well since you just finished off an entire box of frozen microwavable burritos (8 in a box and still frozen) prior to eating the supplementary container of sour cream that only makes sense.... Of course to really complete your meal, you should start polishing off that new jar of Paul Newman mild salsa.

I need to double my efforts and look for a new job online after work today. One with better pay and of course benefits.

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@tsarstepan,

Doubling a zero effort will still result in your not doing anything, you lazy bum. The main benefit you're looking for is loads of free time to loaf around and watch movies, and work cramps your style.

Got to pay some very costly bills today.

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@firefly,

yep, your crack habit is expensive all right.

took the dog for a long, long walk today... hope that's enough!

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@Mame,

failed to pick up a playboy today eh, try again to morrow you old hag.

I'm ready for a slow walk in the park today myself.

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@Dutchy,

Better watch it--the bare legs sticking out of your raincoat are a dead giveaway that you're there to flash any females you see in the park--and this time the cops are waiting for you, you perv.

I paid a visit to the post office today and found the place pretty empty.

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@firefly,

They saw you coming and all fled because you smell haven't washed yourself in weeks.

I met a charming lady on my morning walk, we had a lot in common.

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@Dutchy,

You're both in the Drug Rehab Program, no doubt.

(Hope you're up to snuff, D, we've missed you - take better care of yourself!)

It was such a lovely day - I should have mowed the lawn!

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@Mame,

Instead, you downed enough gin to sink a ship, appropriately watched your DVD of Titanic for the 152nd time and had a good cry, painted your toenails a ghastly shade of neon green, used it on your dog's nails as well, downed some more gin, consumed a huge bag of chips with a big bowl of clam dip, downed some more gin, and passed out while watching the early evening news. Better luck tomorrow, you lazy dipso.

I'll be getting together with an old friend this week.

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@Mame,

Nah! That would mean getting off your fat ass.

I just took a little hiatus from a2k. (Welcome back Dutch!)

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@NickFun,

You had no option as you were doing time for your crimes, you small time pilferer.

Invited by my neighbour for dinner tonight, looking forward to that as she is a fabulous cook.

(Thanks Nick, glad to be back)

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@Dutchy,

(Hey D... you good?)

You invited your neighbour to dinner and she's doing the cooking?? I don't think so! I think you have some raunchy plans in mind.

My husband left for Montreal again this morning - boo hoo.

1 Reply

@Mame,

You phony, that hunky college student who lives next door to you is already on the way over, allegedly to teach you how to text, in exchange for which you'll grace him with your sexual favors, and then you'll spend the rest of the day guzzling your usual gin, yakking on the phone with your friends, and watching soap operas. You love it when your meal-ticket hubby is out of the way, you two-faced bimbo.

I've been re-organizing my filing cabinet.

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@firefly,

Searching for your coke and hash stash doesn't constitute itself as reorganizing, you really ought to look into rehab.

Later on I am going to make some spinach and cheese tortellini.

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@Sturgis,

That sounds like a lovely meal for your cats, obviously you're heading out to McDonald's for your own meal.

I grilled two juicy T-bone steaks on the BBQ tonight much to my partners delight.

2 Replies

The Insult Chain Game

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