That's not autumn, it is the garbage dump down the street from your house.
I am enjoying a nice, cold bottle of water.
No, no, the lady you are stalking is not pouring that over you to give you pleasure! She really does want you to go away you nutter...
I'm amazed at how the darkness is drawing in already...
If that amazes you then you should be REALLY amazed to learn I can whistle the Star Spangled Banner.
I'm leaving Colorado in 3 days!
In a paddy wagon, as usual?
I'm having salad for dinner.
So skint that you've had to raid that vegetable patch you call an allotment again, dear? Try spending abit less on alcohol...
I love my new job...
Making license plates sure beats delivering magazines to the other cells, doesn't it?
I love a full moon.
You change jobs so often you never get the time to dislike them. Try not getting fired from this one, ok?
I'm enjoying a lovely cup of berry tea.
Integrating the two replies...
The reason you love drinking that berry tea under a full moon is because you were too mean to pay up and stop your house being repossessed even tho we all know you are both loaded...
I think I better check the car is okay...
Yes, check your car, Joe. in case you've been messin' where you shouldn't and your brakes have been tampered with...
I think I'll go and join a dating site.
Don't post a picture if you want to get any replies.
I've got a busy day tomorrow.
Damn busy day seeing your probation officer, drugs and alcohol counsellor and doing your community service I suspect!
I'm going to paint my toenails
Your feet are so big and fat you'll probably need to use a roller to paint them.
I am so glad I have tomorrow off.
So is everybody else you work with.
I'm going to enter a beauty competition.
As what?
I just watered my flowers.
Are they a large tub of pansies?
I'm going to have sex.
The sheep is already cringing.
I just made some delicious soup.
With yourself? That doesn't count...
I wish I wa s somewhere else...
Somewhere like an Institution for Arseholes?
I'm going out on a date.
This must be the first one you've had in 10 or 15 years. He won't call you back.
I have lots of plans for today.
Things to do today:
Get out of bed.
Eat
Drink
Pass out
Go to bed
I'm going for a hike in the Rockies tomorrow
