That tiger print upholstery will look great once you vacuum it.
I can't decide what to have for dinner.
Ah, which can of soup to open tonight? Decisions, decisions.
I love playing with my dog.
I don't think we need to go into the details, do we?
I drank so much last night that I have only just woken up - 8 pm.
You must have hit your head pretty hard when you fell off the wagon, because it's 8pm Tuesday, and you just missed two days of work. Check your answering machine--your boss fired you. Now you have a great excuse to keep drinking, not that you need one.
I feel sort of strange.
You look bloody strange too.
That woman loves being insulted.
I think I'll take her out for a meal.
Another hot dinner date at the dumpster? At least find one that's behind a decent restaurant, those KFC and Burger King leftovers you usually eat won't impress her.
I am making a special Mother's Day dinner.
Hope your Mother is Special enough to cope with your cooking.
I am making some long-distance phone calls on Skype.
foreighn prostitutes this time eh?
I am meant to be doing my work.
People like you make England what it is today.
I think a coffee and a Sachertorte in the town square would be a nice thing to aim for today.
Unless you can panhandle some spare change, I think you will have to settle for whatever food you can find in the trash cans. But, it's nice to know you aim high.
I keep forgetting to do things.
Just accept your senility, it won't go away now.
I want to be like Peter Pan
You are like Peter Pan. You're immature, you never grew up, you seduce minors, and you look ridiculous in those tights.
I have to get ready for work now.
You never told me you were a minor.
Ready for work, tights, heels, micro-skirt and halter top blouse.
I like the odd slapper once in a while.
Heaven knows, there are certainly loads of people wanting to slap you around.
I just did a fast load of laundry.
Falling in the river does not count as washing your clothes.
I'm feeling energetic, I think I'll go for a bike ride.
Once around the kitchen table outa knock that vigor right out of you.
My girlfriend gave her cat a bath.
She should have done you first, you sorely need one.
I'm hooked on a particular brand of pretzels.
Yes, your nuts alright.
I have to go to the dentist tomorrow.
Cracked your dentures on the pistachio shells again?
I hate having to do office work at home.
Kissing butt happens everywhere you go...brown noser.
Hi FF!!
I am in a nasty mood.
