Good thing too since it is your only form of exercise
I have had 24 e-mails so far this morning
Tsk! And after you'd already got your penis extension too!
I am getting addicted to exercise
Raise fork, insert to mouth, lower and again...Whew!
I ran the Boston Marathon in '79.
And what have you done since? Just talk about it, I suppose!
I'm meeting several friends for lunch.
You are sure to find somebody to pay for you that way
I am checking my friends list
Looking at a blank sheet of paper?
I want to win the PowerBall
Well, wishing won't make that happen, so you better get off your butt and get a job.
A good friend just took my advice.
Let us know when the funeral is.
I like miso soup
Soup made from leftover Japanese teabags is not miso soup, you jerk.
I am going to try some whole wheat pasta tonight.
That's good it's the side of beef you eat with it that's bad.
I support the Rams football team.
That's why they're always losing.
I'm going to do some cross-stitch.
Isn't it time you learned how to sew straight? It takes you a month just to hem a skirt.
My sausages got all shriveled up in the microwave.
Isnt that what normally happens to sausages when they are going in your mouth?
I received my W2 today.
Nice that they forwarded it to your jail. Guess you'll have to do your own tax return this year, since your accountant's doing time in a federal pen.
I think I need to drink more water.
Yeah it sucks that you have to keep drinking your urine. Do a trick, maybe someone'll toss you a nickle.
My husband got a speeding ticket today.
Trying to get away from you no doubt!
I still have an unpaid speeding ticket from Texas from a year ago.
Just one of the many offences you have committed
and not been punished for.
It's a bit dull in Wales today.
Truth be known the only dull part is you....everyone else is having a jolly old time.
I have a really bad cold.
One sniffle and you start whining and moaning. Go have some soup and stop acting like such a baby.
I need to have some home repairs done.
Yes, your house looks like it has been hit by Katrina.
I spilled the water butt this morning.
