Hopefully it won't take too much longer to get the job done.
I have to go to work tonight. 12 hours!!
I'll have to call in sick, then.
I have happy feet.
Put your shoes back on we're dying in here.
I have bad gas.
Well, at least it matches your breath.
I need to balance my checkbook.
Why, did one of your checks actually clear?
I find this line to be harder than coming up with an insult.
Aren't you able to string to normal words together?
I don't know if i'm going to be good at this game.
I'm sorry to say that now we know the answer.
Good morning, everyone.
It was...till you showed up.
How 'bout them Red Sox?
You wore them with plaid Bermuda shorts, and you wondered why your blind date ditched you at Burger King?
What does it mean when people say, "Get a life!"?
It means you've been talking about living out your Dungeons and Dragons role-playing fantasies again.
Poker tonight!
After your last attempt to call deuces, aces and one-eyed jacks wild, I'm amazed anyone is willing to let you play.
How can I keep from losing any more hair?
Transplant from your knuckles to your head.
I hung a new picture, yesterday.
Did you color it yourself?
I need a new pair of shoes.
You need a lot more than that, honey.
I just got five boxes of irises to plant
Why not just kill them now and get it over with?
What new book should I read?
I'd suggest something with "Captain Underpants" in the title.
Cold and rainy here today.
To each according to his achievements. Cold and rainy for you.
Should I blow off work and go on a date tonight?
Why not, you're always "on" your date.
No flu shot for me this year.
Is that what we're calling incarceration, now?
Ham and cheese sandwich for lunch.
Yes, I can see that. Please close your mouth.
What type of sushi will I have?
