You can't even run without tripping over yourself, and you think you can ski?
I'm an excellent skier.
Weren't those Sonny Bono's last words too?
I am meeting an old friend later for lunch.
Ah yes, your old friend indigestion. Perhaps heartburn will join you too.
You meet so many old friends whenever you lunch at that taco stand.
I was floored by the price of gas this week.
You should stop eating at the taco stand with Sturgis
I had goulash last night for the first time
The prison kitchen is getting more adventurous.
I have to call my veterinarian.
Are you feeling ill?
I am going to have a lazy day today
Just like every other day, you bum.
I left one of my packages in the supermarket yesterday.
What did you have for supper, or did you go back and get the dog food?
Coffee time
Oh, so the people at table four have left? Don't forget the half eaten muffin and maybe their leftover scrambled eggs too.
Today looks like it will be absolutely splendid.
Spending the day in the basement again?
Oops, I forgot to feed the dog and cat this morning
You have pets at the insane asylum?
Word has it that an intruder broke into the Pastor's house Thursday night.
Have you prepared your alibi?
Not sure if I should have breakfast or brunch
Since you never stop eating, all your meals sort of blur together, don't they?
Too much coffee doesn't agree with me.
In other words, "too much effort involved in stealing it off the tables at the local restaurant" so it would be too much work.
I'm considering a new winter coat, I wonder what color I should choose.
Shocking pink should suit you.
I'm off t't pub to start an argument.
Hoping that somebody will throw beer at ya again so you can get a free drink on the floor?
I might watch some TV tonight
Can't get enough Spongebob, huh?
Time to go mow the yard.
Is two yards too much for you?
According to the clock it is now a day of rest.
Your clock hasn't changed in 5 years...of course this is no surprise since it's just a picture of one.
Bad news, the cable is out.
Can't you get it back in?
Mi fag just went out.
