Been eating your own cooking again?
I'm putting off doing my work.
And you're putting me off my food. Go take a shower!
Did you know that cicadas have a 13 or 17 year life cycle?
If that's your idea of snappy conversation, we know why you never get invited to parties.
I'm going to work on my tax return today.
Be sure to claim your bed as a deduction since you work on your back.
I'm a tax attorney.
Two things I hate most.
I don't have to go to work until Monday.
Slacker.
I need a vacation.
Wannabe slacker.
I'm going to the Cubs home opener on Fri.
Taking your glove with you? Going to order some Cracker Jack?
Now I'm an envious wannabe slacker.
Well at least you have goals.
...and I have bleacher seats.
Do you usually occupy two or three spaces on the bleacher?
Drink a beer for me while you're there.
I thought you might be an alcoholic. (you got it)
Going to go hit the driving range before it starts raining.
Pounding your clubs on the ground won't help.
I can drive it 300+.
Driving your weight is impressive.
I haven't golfed in years.
With a car like that no doubt.
My driver is the worst part of my game.
Neither one of you could make par with a hooker.
I'm back!
I never noticed you were missing.
I've got to buy some grass seed.
Not even drug talk is going to get you anywhere with Seed... give it up, its hopeless, move on.
I'm so tired, when I lean against a wall I fall asleep
You're so fat, when you lean against a wall, it falls over.
I'm playing a soccer tournament this weekend.
Aren't you a bit old to play Subbuteo?
Still going to make a phonecall ...
Be sure you put on your reading glasses so you don't misdial, gramps.
I may be older than most on the soccer field, but I can still school the little pups.
